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My name is Tom Bear Bell.  I was born in 1950 in a cold climate far up north.  Of 
mixed blood (half Eskimo/ half Polar Bear) ; I am proud to say I was the first of my 
breed (Innuit  Whos clothes don't fit); to enroll in N.A.S.A. (North Arctic Snow 
Association).  At a very early age I displayed a remarkable talent for ice-water 
swimming and snow ball throwing.  I'm a graduate of the C.C.C.P. Institute (Cold 
Cold Clammy Polarbears).  I currently live in Iceland, but to me, it seems a bit too 
warm, so I might move back north.  My hobbies include grabbing fish from open 
ice holes, and sliding on my backside.  I also enjoy panic attacks (you should 
see their eyes when I attack!!), and being sutured.  I'm well respected as a 
talented master of the tarraddle (Yet another $10 word!!!)  I'm 8 foot, nine inches 
tall, (when I'm not too lazy to stand up.), with a white, somewhat hoary 
complection.  My religion is Histopathology, where I am considered an "elder".  
My goal in life is to create the world's first wide bodied twelve blade disposable 
razor.  I was married once, but during an extended famine, I was forced to devour 
my spouse.  I have 3 Cubs, but they're currently in Chicago.  My email address is; 
Wasteland Ice Polar Trade Post- box 12, which is 6 miles north of thw north pole.  
I hope to hear from you'se soon, however, no animal rug lovers please!!!.
                                          Tom

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