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Adventures of Robin Hood and his Merry Men.

               No1.

 Robin’s Thick Member

We wuz out huntin that day
Ah remembers as plain as can be
When a ansome buck came us way
Fust to shoot was me mate Unlucky

Now that buck he just looked in us faces
With an air of his royal decree
Displayin his arrogunt graces
At the arra there stuck in the tree

Ah says, “Robin, he won’t be best pleased
At missin his dinner agen
Your damn good at arrain trees 
An pissin off his merry men”

If we goes back to camp with no meal
That maid, she will giv us sum stick
She’ll shove us sum manky old veal
An the merry men will all be sick”

Then Unlucky he says that he saw
Over there be-ind the rockery
A big ol boy of a boar
But his arra, yes, it foun a tree

Stood Marion with expectation
The night would be one great party
But after me grand explanation
We was whipped a foot up from the knee

Then Robin  “Unlucky”, he says
“You’s a poor shot as all us can see
If that buck agen inter view strays
Just bloomin well aims fer the tree.

Coz averages seem to dictate
You could bag that buck if you tried
If only you’d concentrate
An wern’t so bloody cross eyed”

So Unlucky he thinks to his sen
I’ll show them a thing or two
That big head an his stinky men
Will be dinin on best red deer stew

Once more he foun his sen afore
That deer who was showin no fear
He watched as his arra did soar
Past that grinnin bucks twitchin left ear

But wait, that buck he was down
His hooves in the air on his back
The arra that just missed his crown
Had given him sheer heart attack

He was cheered when he got back to camp
An the night became one great party
With a bow he was proclaimed a champ
An no longer known as Unlucky.

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