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On the eve of, demand. Betrayal was rising. 
The voice of strength evaded me. 
The knife pushed deeper in.
Darkness awoke within me. Its grip squashing the life I thought I had.
I hate you. I despise you.
You killed the life within me.&nbsp; The cracks kept showing.
I died a thousand deaths, t he memory burned out my frontal lobe.
No words of truth or lies to bind those charred connections.
Twisted expectance of soliloquy to compete with these
Mounting streams of inner wars, they all purge me 
With heavenly fire but they feel like antagonizing strings of strife

A thousand arrows aimed at my hearts beating drum.
No mirth or merry go round ride to quench this drying adrenaline rush
Struck at the top with the loose end, going wild 
The wind up here is so loud; my ears are crashing because of these revelations 
These outlandish antics whip and bruise my face
They like fleeting backward incomprehensive syllables. 
I am trying to fathom the meaning of the it.
Those words I thought I understood they lost their meaning the second I tried to say them out loud to myself.

It feels like nothing makes sense. The meaning this is all too clear 
The end is nigh. 
Can you smell it in the air? 
Can you feel it on the wind? 
Can you hear it in my breathing?
My lungs are contracting. The floor is slipping
My world is crumbling. It is falling out of its orbit

How will I survive? 
I just can’t take this anymore!
Take me over already!
Don’t hold back. I won’t hold back. I am open. 

My fighting spirit is not responding. No retaliation. I am all yours.
The reality hazes my eyes and I am lost to the darkness.
Forever trapped in a nightmare of bitter dreams.
As I plunge over to the other side. 
A light pierces my darkness and I see your face.
Your smile and laughter, a melodious song calling back to sanity
But as soon the detail starts to solidify
The sun sets and I’m plunged back into the abyss
The cold follows soon after. 

 

Geniuskin
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