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If I walk alone through a thousand days, each hour I shall try to make peace with my past, with my battles, my loss and grief - my soul shall still hope, though my smile’s stay is brief. Today, oh today, I’ll overcome dread, unwrapping myself from guilt’s unmade bed. I’ll squeeze clouds overhead, wring out my tears found. I’ll loop stars in my sight, unshackle feet bound - to feel embraced when all love seems to die, to stifle my sobs until brown eyes dry, lifted from exhaustive anxiety, unburdened by a crippling frailty. I’ve reproached my Father, head bowed in prayer, my heaviest heart has poured out till bare. Despite bricks I lay, I know He still cares. Oh, more than I care for myself today! I’ve hidden under blankets smothered in my childish uncertainty, covered. I’ve pretended with my deceptive smiles; for a midnight sun’s warmth, I’ve reached out for miles. To cower in anxiety, to wail in my frailty, I’ve come to stumble and accept an echo deafened by my hollow steps. Weighed down by an ever taunting earth, in a lonely, ailing mind, I hurt. Perhaps, tomorrow I’ll build a new bridge freed from this escapable bondage. *an old poem revised
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