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Poem

To never see your face again 
To lose the map of your body
To misplace memory itself 

For example   
Today I lost your nose 
I couldn't remember which nostril
Was bigger 
 
Last month it was your facial hair 
How it felt against my flesh 
I still hold on to your aftershave smile 

But the hair on your forearm
is still vivid  
Brown red and black 
An earthly pallet  
Like ivy climbing up you arms  

You hated your bodily hair
You shaved it every month 
I begged you to save it and love yourself 

I recall diving my face 
Unto your chest hair 
It got warmer
The deeper I dove 

those lazy afternoons 
How the fog transcended us both 
I took naps on your stomach 
As the cats watched us 

Remember when you punched that guy 
And he tried to strangle you 
I clawed his face 
His wife pulled my hair 
That was our honey moon 

You called the police 
I called my mom 
And cried 
You visited me in the hospital 
With guilt dripping from your eyes 

Words flew like poisoned darts 
Others wanted us apart 
But we stuck 
Each carrying their cross 

Were we ever Heroes?
Doubtful 
We were the fools 
Laughed at by the children
we never birthed  

I wanted to say goodbye 
But I was too angry to realize 
That goodbyes are a formality  
 When your soul suddenly dies 

We will never have Paris 
We hated it 
Instead, We will each cry 
In a separate house 

Until one day 
Not far
My face becomes elusive   
Your face turn muddled  

What is left 
This emotional leftovers 
Is the essence of what once was 

-----
Manar Ammar 
Cairo, 2015

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