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The lazy river wasn’t so lazy
In fact, you might say, it drove us crazy
What’s with the waterfalls and toddlers screaming?
I looked at my partner; she wasn’t beaming

Thunder Rapids left us doomed in darkness
Why did we think this ride would be harmless?
Two eight-foot drops suspended us mid-air
As two mature ladies, we had quite the scare

The Serpentine Serpent was a near-drowning
As huge blasts of water our lungs were downing
Nearly toppling as on our sides we raced our tube
My friend Sandra lost her balance in this jiffy-lube

Finally we headed for the “kiddy-land” ride
Where upon a thin sponge we did slip and slide
Too fast on one corner, Sandra flew
For shoulder repair, she needed “super glue”

Who’d believe a water park could render such pain
They carried us out on an “old folks” crane
Never to return, we vowed that day
This is a park where only “kids” should play



*Co-written with a super, but non-Souper, friend on April 15, 2015, less than a week after the true experience as we recover in ICU ;D

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