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What’s in Your Whatchamacallit

Capital One asks “What’s in your wallet”
I’m thinking what’s in your whatchamacallit
Biosolids is the official label
The aftermath of last night’s dinner table
If this isn’t clear, I apologize
I don’t want to get graphic in young reader’s eyes
But let’s cut to the chase, get to the scoop
There’s gold and there’s silver in everyone’s poop
Researchers have found at least 50 metals
In the biosolids when all of it settles
Substantially enriched in rare platinum group
So much silver and gold in treatment plants poop
Waste products produced by a million of us
Is about 13 million, let’s further discuss
With the US population let me make this clear
We are pooping out gold at 4 billion a year
Poop has been gathered from big towns and small
With commercially mineable concentrations in all
It’s not really clear how it gets in our waste
Hair products, cosmetics or food that we taste
No matter the source all researchers conclude
We send silver and gold down the defecate tube

Another true story from your Uncle Mike.  Not only am I not getting rich writing poetry, I appear to be flushing away millions down the toilet.

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