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A skeleton walks into a bar and says “Gimme a beer and a mop” Show me where Joseph Stalin is buried And I'll show you a communist plot My masseuse rubbed me the wrong way again Fired her though she had good skills A duck in a bar orders a couple of beers Says, “Just put it on my bill” About seven million people are overweight These, of course, are round figures Where would you find giant snails I ask On the ends of a giant's fingers Studied over four years to become a doctor But I didn't have any patience A Buddhist refused Novocain from his dentist To transcend dental medication Had a job working in an orange juice factory Got canned 'cause I couldn't concentrate Also worked for a pool maintenance company Too draining so getting fired was my fate Thought I'd try working as a tailor a while back But the job wasn't suited for me Can you please tell me the purpose of reindeer It makes the grass grow, my sweetie Enough is enough so until next time we meet Thanks for your indulgence once more I will definitely want your honest critique But please be gentle, I implore © Jack Ellison 2014
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