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Inflammatory Bowel Disease (IBD) Are you upset by stomach pains Diarrhea and bad cramps Are you so dog-gone tired You can’t even outrun your Gramps Have you tried all the common cure-alls? Medication - - - therapy Massage and acupuncture But relief just ain’t to be Then perhaps you are finally ready For a cure that some find quite weird To counter your bad IBD That the FDA still hasn’t cleared See they think that an imbalance Of bacteria within your body Causes inflammation And your stomach gets all knotty So to fix that bad imbalance Here’s what some say to do Insert some helpful microbes From someone’s healthy poo Yes – I said from someone’s poop A relative or somebody close Just a pinch within the cheeks Would be a healthy dose It’s now trending in America This desperate D Y I If you suffer from this IBD You just might give it a try They are running tests in Canada To evaluate and study To see if fecal implants Will cure or harm somebody But there are those who’ve tried it And swear it did the trick No longer show the symptoms No longer feel that sick Now your doctor won’t approve it Your friends will think you’re nuts Passing fecal matter The wrong way through your butts But they say that just like blood banks There will be donor centers too Where healthy individuals Can dump off healthy poo Don’t ask me to assist you Back where the sun don’t shine But you can have a handful Of any poo of mine I don’t write this to belittle The pain you’re going through But I read this on the internet So I know it must be true And it just got me thinking This might help someone like you Another true news item from your Uncle Mike
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