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You often accuse me of seeing you through biased eyes. That is one of the deep pleasures in life. To see someone through the eyes of the heart, in all the incredible beauty that endows them with. It is a richer treasure than all of the storied gold and jewels of the ancient world. The extremes of passion can make you full and then empty, loved and then forgotten, cared for and then abandoned but only to be loved and cared for and full again. To bring your cup to overflowing with joy and pain, overflowing with your own riches and loves and meanings in life. To spill your wine because you now know it is filled and will be replenished. To love life. To love. There is nothing that is more alive, nothing more exciting or exhausting, nothing that looses the rich fertile soil that grows the soul like loving somebody. Loving somebody is more ferocious and tenacious than all the forces of negativism in the world put together. Loving somebody brings more excitement and richness to life than all of the most exotic places in the universe. I have just been through the most exciting thing in my whole life. I never even suspected it could happen to me. Let alone here and in this last year. I fell very very deeply in love. An incredibly beautiful woman let me into her heart and I learned slowly but very slowly to let myself love life through her with all my heart. I loved, more deeply, more incredibly than I have ever let myself love before. Its no wonder I can't sleep at night. I want to say Oh my God, Life is exciting, people are amazing and, as hard as it is, life can open up to me too, even me. I loved her. I loved her, I want to shout to the world, I loved someone. Life was willing to embrace me too. I too felt love. The most precious gift of all, to be able to love someone, and I'm almost afraid to go to sleep for fear I'll wake up and find it all a dream and myself feeling like I did before I loved you. 1882
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