Email Poem

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Poem

I’ m happy that you knocked my door
So what, if I don’t really know you
In this world of fantasy, I can pretend anything to be true.
Pretend I have known you, pretend that I love you
Pretend that I care. Like I did for everyone who was here.
So what, if in couple days, you would walk out
Impermanence is the rule of the world, and I expect nothing to stay.
You don’t really know the coldness in my heart, do you?
You would never. I‘d watch you go and let you disappear.
I have let go of many things. Since a child.
Tears don’t come to me. Even if I try.
I don’t want to hold on and wait till the end
Watch it break into a million pieces and go through the pain
The pain that left so many unhealed scars, only had you looked in me.
 
But I am human, feelings do overwhelm me
Do I get swayed by the temptation, that you stay? 
I laugh. I hurry through my feelings, I know that they are cheating
On me. Cause, feelings are but temporary illusions. Like when you are dreaming.
And then, there’s another face. Another place.
Another few fleeting nights of faking love
And a life in complete mess.
 
Did I make you smile? Make you feel loved?
Make you believe, that I care
So what if I am only to dissapear.

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