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I was stuck in traffic Just the other day When a certain feeling hit me In a most horrific way I felt a pressure building It's happened more than once But the fact I didn't learn Made me feel just like a dunce Sweat was on my forehead My foot was on the brake "LET'S GET THIS TRAFFIC MOVING!!" I said for goodness sake I've got to reach an exit To answer natures call I'd settle for a tree or shrub But I prefer a stall The cars then started moving I thought, "I'll make it through" But ten feet brought another halt Now here comes number two My forehead sweat is beading As internal pressure builds I dread to think what happens If my need is not fulfilled The guy beside me's drinking From a Big Gulp soda cup Unconcerned of progress As I watch him turn it up Again we start to moving I can see the end in sight A blue sign shows the promise Of a restaraunts delight It's not their food I'm seeking But their plumbing there within I'll be glad to order something If that's what it takes to win I've got one lane to change So I put my blinker on I hope the guy back to my right Can see what's going on Here we go. We start to roll The guy gives me a space It's just another fifty feet To help me end my race I grit my teeth and grip the wheel With bowels and bladder full I make it to the exit And I pray to save my soul I finally reach the turning point But then the light turns red I wonder if there's someone Out there messing with my head With muscles growing weaker I hope that I don't seep The pain that I'm enduring Is enough to make me weep But then the light turns green And we're free to move along "Lord just let me make it Before anything goes wrong" I turn into a parking lot And find the nearest space I park my car and jump out Then I'm off to run the race I find the restroom there inside The one that's marked for men I turn the knob and find it locked DAMN!! Where does it end? I dance around and grab myself And then I hear a flush My eyes roll back into my head I feel a certain rush I know the moment's near at hand When I can have some peace Just get that bastard outta there So I can feel release Rockman :-)
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