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Poem

More Zany Headlines

Actual newspaper headlines taken mainly from 
http://www.alphadictionary.com/fun/headlines.html

Poem constructed by Elton Camp

Let us hope that they will soon decide:
“Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide”

Surely safety standards this abridges:
“Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges”

We surely expect that the voltage won’t be as large:
“Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge”

Before you eat, give them whacks:
“Kids Make Nutritious Snacks”

This headline is certain to make you laugh:
“Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half”

The community was shocked when this they read:
“Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead”

Not enough training the following suggests:
“Lawmen from Mexico Barbecue Guests”

It’s a disease of humans one assumes:
“Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms”

As Abel got from Cain:
“Man is fatally slain”

The warning should be sounded louder:
“Milk Drinkers are Turning to Powder”

When she’s sick, she’ll be lots more fun:
“Never Withhold Herpes from Loved One”

His honor should someone impeach?
“NJ Judge to Rule on Nude Beach”

Surprises seem they will never cease:
“Children Alleged Shot by Police”

Headline writers easily get into quite a plight
If what they compose doesn’t come out right

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