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Poem

Keeping a Secret

By Elton Camp

Whatever you tell me will assuredly be secure.
That I might spread it around you need not fear.
No matter what the temptation, my lips are sealed.
Your deepest, darkest secret will never be revealed.

Oh, so you took your blond-haired secretary out a date?
With her looks, I can see why your wife would be irate.
I’ve noticed how she dresses when at work.
It’s easy to see why she’d drive you berserk.  

You didn’t do something really vile.
At least it seems she’s not with child.  
As long as you never take her out again,
There’s no reason your marriage need end.

It’s best to give your secretary the axe.
With her out of the way, you can relax.
Take my good advice and never tell a soul.
It’ll never be learned by your wife Nicole.

Keeping quiet was easy enough for a while,
But when I thought of it, I’d have to smile.
He won’t object if I only tell my wife.
We share everything we learn in life.  

So I told it to her and she didn’t stop
Until she reached the old beauty shop.
“Hey, girls, while Sue’s fixing your hair
I have some juicy gossip I want to share.”

It was heard by a half a dozen.
And one was Nicole’s cousin.
Such treachery she couldn’t abet.
Nicole learned it before the sun set.

The result then, of course,
A messy and angry divorce.
Remember what Benjamin Franklin said:
“Three can keep a secret if two are dead.”

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