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The farmer sent his son to agricultural school for an education,
To see if he could learn anything about an agrarian vocation.
Professors filled his head with ideas about operating a farm.
Such nonsense caused the old man raging headaches and alarm!

"Son, when it comes to farmin', them perfessors ain't got a clue.
I've been farmin' nigh on fifty years and I'm a-tellin' you,
Yer book-larnin' and them silly ideas is all outta whack;
This here farm is run by the moon and the Farmer's Almanac!"

"Now, when you plant pertaters, one thing is very plain.
You plow and sow 'em when the moon is on the wane.
When it comes to makin' hay, don't never cut it too soon;
Wait til it's a-bloomin' and mow in the full of the moon."

"When butcherin' hogs, you must do it when it's opportune,
And that means you kill 'em at the right time of the moon.
Let the Farmer's Almanac be yer guide when plantin' seeds.
It's also helpful fer prunin' trees and killin' noxious weeds."

"There'll be platoons of county agents a-tellin' me what to do.
Them fellers can talk all they want til their face is blue!
They'll try to change my ways, but I ain't hummin' that old tune.
This here place is run by the Almanac and hangin' of the moon!"

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (© All Rights Reserved)

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