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I went home wearing my dinner.
I had egg all over my face.
Something I said had made her see red
And she dumped spaghetti over my head.
Maybe I should have said “Sorry”
But she quickly stormed from the place
Leaving me there with sauce in my hair
Trying to act as if I didn’t care.

The waitress, she tried to be helpful
But I know she wanted to laugh.
And there I just sat with my edible hat
Trying to make like the Cheshire cat.
And the restaurant, it got so quiet
Right after my big social gaffe. 
As I crossed the floor with the food that I wore
Casually making my way to the door.

	I cannot recall what I said that made her so angry.	
	I don’t understand why she wanted to make such a scene.
	But I am just thankful we didn’t order a dessert…
	At least I don’t have to wash off banana cream.

Well, my best suit was totally ruined
And my dignity looked even worse
But I didn’t dare react to the stares
As I slowly and carefully walked out of there.
And there she was next to the cashier,
Seems she’d forgotten her purse.
And I knew I was dead when she grabbed the french bread
And proceeded to smack me upside of my head…

	First course: a helping of foot.
	Open mouth, insert boot.
	Next course I guess I should go
	And chow down an extra large helping of crow.

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