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We flew a million miles in eighteen hours
Amongst the cotton ball clouds
To a new land and new adventure
To do whatever we want ,whenever and whatever’s allowed

Plane travel is not my favourite
It makes me fearful and l find it quite gross
Though due to a long expat lifestyle
I have had more than my fair dose

So, l will tell you the things that bother me
You may not feel as l do
Some just love to fly
Into the world of yonder blue

So here are my gripes 
l actually have a few
Its claustrophobic, cramped and stuffy 
Not a whiff of fresh air in view

The toilets are tiny and feral
Wee on the seat and floor 
How anyone could join the mile high club in one
I find mind blowing and totally abhor

Now the for other flyers
Most courteous and polite
However there is another breed
Who believe they are the only one on the flight

The farters,  nose pickers and rip snorters
The demanding and rude
Banger of seats and complete ignoramuses 
There my gripes conclude

So after eighteen hours without sleep
A body full of aches and pains
Sitting next to a man named Mr Harry-endous B.O
I wanted out of this suffocating container called a plane

Five hours later we arrive at our destination
A slice of purest heaven that had fell to earth
The plane trip faded into insignificance 
When surrounded by such exquisite beauty and worth

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