Email Poem

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Poem

I've given it thought 

I've tried reading your heart 

It never worked 

cause you made me wanna kill my art.



What am I doing?

Maybe I should just leave myself alone

and bite my bones 

What am I saying? 

Bloody sheets and a bloody bed 

It's just me dead silent in my head.



I wanna kill you but I still want your teeth in my back

I loved you but you make me wanna snap 

I hate you but I still need your bottle cap.



You held me hostage 

I allowed it 

cause I wanted the attention.

Stockholm syndrome 

except now your the one tied up in my head.

Holding my weapon

wondering if you should be alive or dead .


What am I thinking? 

Is it possible for you to die?

are you even alive?.

What am I feeling?

Maybe I'm the one who is at fault

cause I seesaw leaving myself alone.



I wanna kill you but I still want your teeth in my back 

I loved you but you make me wanna snap

I hate you but I still need your bottle cap.



I've given it thought 

What's the point of my status ?

when are bodies will decay or be ashes.

Inscription of my milestones

Never mind that

if I'm unable to read my own gravestone.

Premeditated murder 

I'll still be charged whether it does or doesn't work.


Bottle cap in my pocket,

will I keep or toss it?
 
Warm or cold heart ?

all I know is that I'm a murderer of my own art.

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