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I’d love to be a model Tall and thin like Jerry Hall But I like fish and chips too much And I’m only five feet tall I’d love to be a dancer With poise, and style, and grace But I was born with two left feet And would end up flat on my face I’d love to be a climber Scaling mountains in one single bound But I get dizzy in high heels So I’d best keep my feet on the ground I’d love to be an athlete With medals of gold on my chest But it takes all my breath, to run a bath So relaxing at home is best I’d love to be a painter And have works of art hanged in great halls, But the only paint that I can use Is emulsion you slop onto walls I’d love to be an actress Starring on the silver screen But with my memory, I’d forget the script “What was I saying?” – see what I mean I’d love to be an explorer Through untamed jungles I’d caper But I love the luxuries of life Like hot baths, and toilet paper! I’d love to be a poet And write my own anthology But that’s just another pipe dream So I’ll have to be, just me.
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