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My friend cracked my ribs with laughter,
When he told me a story about boarding school days.
He said to me that, he used to sit in the corner near the window
facing the direction of the school kitchen.
One day, as the lesson was in progress, he saw one chef 
putting salt in a pot of relish. 
Later on, another came with salt again,
 and he wanted to add to the same pot. 
He forgot that he was in class and shouted on top of his voice
"No,no salt is already added in that pot, my chef". 
The way everyone looked at him, including the teacher!

And, again he continued that one day, he attended 
a gospel crusade and somebody touched his shoulder
 and shouted, 
" You will surely walk". 
He didn't bother because he knew he was not lame. 
After the gospel crusade, he touched his pocket
 and he couldn't find his wallet which 
contained transport money, 
Surely he walked to his home!

Again, he told me about his first heartbreak in life. He woke up her 2 months niece around 02:00 hours and started to explain in detail to her, guess what? She also started to cry bitterly and nonstop!
After another breakup, somebody told him that you will remember me. But, he answered her " My friend I have solved calculus for 5 years but I don't remember any formula".

He also said he remembers one night they had a reunion party with family and friends. They drank a lot, also roasted their goat. Surprisingly, in the morning the goat was still there but their dog was missing!

One day, he went to the mountains to kill himself because of pressure, but all of the sudden the big snake came out of nowhere and chased him. Oh, no, he almost died of heart attack!

On the wedding day of his daughter, he told the DJ to play solemn Music for 7 hours. He sat done and cry first, then told the DJ to switch to energetic and danceable tunes!

He continued, the wife material on earth is the hen. She feeds her children without disturbing her husband unlike daughters of Jezebel!

Lastly, he talked about the Sugar mummy who begged him for a loan, the way he's stingy over his money. He wondered how Sugar mummy survived the Civid-19 era!

Concept by Zambian Comedians
Poetry by Chipepo Lwele
08/02/2023
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