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Yesterday, my professor, with a kind disposition, Told me that my inability to get the work done, was sometimes not depression at all, but rather a lazy refusal to press in to the tedium of scholarship. A time ago, I was suicidal and went to the mental health co-op where the intake officer scolded me like a child for not trusting in God. We walk alone. Some years ago, my father in law shot himself at point blank range, My brother and brother in law called him selfish. On campus, I often smile, and every frown that I receive reminds me of a world in which time is of the essence. Time is an essence that people use to achieve and consume as they pass by the invisible men under the bridge. Every day, as I walk with my bold, black, bodacious, body, I am invisible to the frowns of those with thoughts of conquest and dominion. And every time I think of unrequited kindness, I realize, We walk alone. And yet there is a voice, a voice that is rarely audible, that screams to me from billboards, “Hold on my son, hold on!” We walk alone. And yet there is a voice that told me through Linda Roberts this morning, “your presence changes things Woody, your presence changes things!” Sometimes as I walk, I hear a voice whisper throughout my being, “YOU WALK ALONE!” And yet there is another voice, THAT SCREAMS through Sita, when she tells me that I am a blessing, And yet there is another voice, And I tell you, this Voice, is never silent. IT SCREAMS through the selfish facades of the Conquistadors, the American Conquistadors that rail against my brethren and worship efficiency. And I tell you, though I walk alone, though we walk alone. There is a voice THAT SCREAMS TO US!! “My children you must not give up, for your presence changes things!” And every time I submit for HIM to speak through me, I convince another, and another, that things need not be this way, And so, yes we walk alone. But though we walk through the valley of the shadow of death, and though we fear evil and the pernicious fangs of ignorant people who think they help us with their words of venom, yes though we walk alone, THERE IS A VOICE, THE VOICE OF THOUSANDS, MILLIONS OF CREATURES, CREATURES OF LIGHT THAT COMFORT US IN THIS SOLITUDE. AND SO IN THE END, WE WALK ALONE, BUT IF WE HOLD ON TO THE END!! IF WE HOLD ON TO THE VOICE THAT SCREAMS, “I AM WITH YOU!!” WE WALK INTO THE JOYOUS FAMILY OF DREAMS FULFILLED, AND WE KNOW COMMUNITY!!
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