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(Listen to Lauren Daigle’s song “You Say”
This song encourages and inspires me.)

Never Good Enough

The small insidious voice that tells me
“You can never measure up!”
Wars are being fought in the recesses of my spirit!!!
The soldiers are battling from both sides 
To strive for perfect
But never meet the mark.

The voice of my father echoes like a loudspeaker
Why didn’t you get 100?
But dad, “98 is pretty good…”
“Never good enough… 
you can always improve!”

Pushing and pushing to always keep trying!
Never giving up…
The negative chatter in my mind
like a group of dogs barking 
throughout the neighbourhood
at one travelling squirrel
at 6am…

I spoke the truth quietly
To those dark and buried lies
I thought they were long ago, dispelled.
Only to find they silently and stealthily 
crawled back through the crevices
and into my head
From deep, deep below.

The time has come
I must scream the truth.
“You are good enough!”
Emancipation has begun!

Its time to dig them out 
and thrust them far away,
But they cling like a vine to a trellis
as I pull the roots, 
unearthing their lies
These tenacious weeds to my soul 
are exposed and laid bare!

Quietness at last,
A peaceful reprieve.
Striving for excellence 
but not driven by this 
conflict!!

Grace Daub November 9, 2021

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