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King Hypocrite We have the king of hypocrites, right here on the soup With more chastising, straight from his stoop Once again, he points his finger, from high on his wall A brand new blog with the same childish bawl Deleted in twenty-four, that’s his usual hit and run He likes his big words that help hide his fun He stands at his pulpit, his thesaurus in hand It makes him feel smart, here in poetry land He likes to praise your work and then throw a punch He’ll tuck tail and run and be gone before lunch He gets his mighty courage straight from the keg He’ll get blind drunk and then hump your leg The simple truth will always contradict him So he looks for new poets and then plays the victim Like the trolls before him, he’ll wobble on his wall Then like humpty dumpty, he will crack from his fall
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