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Confessions of a Swirly Straw The Swirly Straw said to the Clear Cola “I don’t mean to pry but I’m tired of getting double teamed Like some harlot in a trashy movie If I wanted so many ménage a trios’ I would have wished to be a porn star Or possibly a prostitute And even if I were born Jenna Jameson, Francesca Le, or Kobe Tai I would have chosen a different occupation Yes, it’s true I was Cleopatra in a past life And perhaps I was the infamous Jezebel also And perhaps I enjoy the physical act of sex A little too much But there is something very unsettling about my top being tongued and sucked on while a river of sticky sweet liquid Is shot up my bottom twisting and turning through my body like a shivering orgasm And besides your effervescing bubbles are tickling me in all the wrong spots So the next time this anonymous person puts his lips to me make yourself scarce and get out of my way or mark my words you’ll pay energy has a funny way of coming back to you and reimbursing the guilty for all the things they do.” Confessions of Clear Cola The Clear Cola said to the Swirly Straw “My love I know you don’t recognize me We sometimes don’t identify everything we see But we keep on meeting again and again Why just last year, I was the ink and you the pen I flow through your veins like a fish in the sea Do you remember my love? It is I Antony In each life we meet, and I swim inside you Sometimes I am blood, once I was the drink Yoo-hoo And another thing I’m pretty sure of is That anonymous person putting his lips to you is Caesar from Rome In most lifetimes he comes to devour me Like a rabid dog with his mouth filled with foam He is my nemesis, My demise, The reason I die But one of these lives He is going to get, an Eye for an Eye I’ve waited thousands of years, And if I have to, I’ll wait more For just one chance To settle the score Et tu Caesar? Well I can’t rightly say But I promise you Caesar You’ll rue the day.” By: Joseph DeMarco
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