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‘ex post facto’ it is facile to see the human reality of  matter

one does not need artificial intelligence to feel sorrow and joy

	a life not bravely examined is not worth living

	and therefore she dissected her innermost self

	took scalpel and reason but failed to exhume

	what matters most when cut through the chase

	inspected valves chambers and flow of emotion

‘be kind to yourself’ but at first the knife was rather too blunt

double edged as well and she needed tweezers and forceps

	‘where is the handle because I must get a firm grip

	wrap a bandage around my soul and tear into pain’

	a psychiatry bible rested uncomfortably aside an atlas

	four chambers no doubt be it water fire air and earth

	compassion kindness love and no doubt depression

formalin tested her nostrils with the corpse unsurprisingly dead

broken arrows at the core and faded names inscribed in dry blood

	the life support machine had groaned under pressure

	injection and years on the couch but nothing but stasis

	hemolytic infusions adrenaline cardio version exhaustion

	until she decided to explore what mattered the most

	breathing barely more than sufficient she nearly arrested

a heart transplant was not for faint hearted patient’s emotions

but when she got going there was no going back in her theatre

	mental surgery required passion courage and centre

	the eye of an eagle and the skill to let go and recover

	‘pioneering is quite fun’ she had to admit and proceeded

	discovered that she was more than a cultural artefact

	but living proof of suppression and uneasy surrender

what she learnt to love best in the end was her dark depression

because this nasty compassion opened her eyes and her heart


5th August 2020

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