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What Would Santa Claus Say
by Michael R. Burch
 
What would Santa Claus say,
I wonder,
about Jesus returning
to Kill and Plunder?
 
For he’ll likely return
on Christmas Day
to blow the bad
little boys away!
 
When He flashes like lightning
across the skies
and many a homosexual
dies,
 
when the harlots and heretics
are ripped asunder,
what will the Easter Bunny think,
I wonder?

NOTE: The biblical book of Revelation says that Jesus will murder children himself for their mother's sins, in the letters to the Churches. But he won't stop there, according to the writer of Revelation, because after all the earth's creatures have sung the praises of God, a third of them will be destroyed in acts of bloody carnage, along with a third of human beings. That's trillions of animals and billions of people. I can't believe the compassionate Jesus of the gospels, who had table fellowship with prostitutes and refused to stone an adulteress, is going to suddenly start murdering their children and become the greatest serial murderer of all time. And how can the man who taught us to put aside religious differences to practice compassion in the Parable of the Good Samaritan not follow his own advice? Jesus reserved all his sternest criticism for hypocrites, so wouldn't he have to live up to his own teaching?

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