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Give a child life at birth
Make it a C section or natural
Feed them warm mammary milk
Give them two parents when possible
Cloth them in cotton and wool
Give them a bath because children stink
Teach them to think and about soap and water
Take them to the doctors when they are ill
Take children on long walks
Speak gently when you talk
Read two books to them at bedtime
Pray and eat every meal together
Cultivate good behavior by example
Instruct them to work hard and play harder
Give them candy after age thirty two
Answer all their questions with truth
Answer sex questions commensurate with their age
Give books filled with knowledge as gifts 
Educate them first at home
Teach them fishing, sports and especially golf 
Teach children about love 
Drop them off at school and a place of worship
Assign two body guards at all times
Drop them but never on their heads
Slap them if they get fresh
Slap them twice if liberals are present
Send children to self defense classes
Kiss them on the forehead and cheek
Say I love you one hundred times a week
Buy them a toy car or real one if you have the money
Leave them to their own devices when they turn ninety
Conjure up hundreds of questions (Children are smarter than you think)
 Advise them to live their own lives
Remind them they only live twice
(God will understand your answers)
Remind them frequently to sing and dance
Remind them to take a bath


*The road to success is always under construction.
Avoid destruction.  Children need structure and instruction.  Always love them.
Children are like plants. Give them plenty of water.  Leave them alone to grow in the light.

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