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Billie was a true authentic hillbilly
who wore no shoes even if it was chilly
his holy jeans looked like swiss cheese
where daily you'd catch a glimpse of his knobby knees

Whenever he left his cabin his Ma would yell bybillie
with his hound dog by his side named Willy Nilly
some folks had bought some woods close nearby
so he went to investigate with his hillbilly eyes

He watched their hired builders build the cabin
which had indoor plumbing which he thought quite lavish
he was used to going to his outdoor john
which had a half moon carved out on the door by his Mom

Finally the new hillbilly's cabin was complete
so to be friendly he bought over some of his deer meat
the couple said no thank you this is unacceptable
as they gazed at him wearing fancy spectacles

Billie caught their looks which looked full of pride
and caught a glimpse of their beautiful cabin inside
a bit rustic but with expensive furniture everywhere
they slowly closed their door as he curiously stood there

Arriving back home he yelled Ma guess what
those new neighbor hillbilly's are actually not
real hillbilly's that look and act like us
but the kind of city slickers that makes a lot of fuss

His Ma just laughed and said well don't that beat all
city slickers moving to the hills where there aint no Mall
Billie saying the only thing the same was our holy jeans
guess they ran out of money buying all those other fancy things

So Billie had a new name for them which was quite silly
he said Ma I blew their cover so I'll call them blowbillies
I think were the only true hillbilly's left in these here parts
tomorrow I'll bring them over some roadkill to win over their hearts

So Billie Hatfield kept on although the neighbors were quite annoyed
finding out later that their last name was McCoy.

 


4-12-18

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