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Caleb Smith's Blog

About Caleb Smith
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Bloggers Photo  Caleb A. Smith was born January 14, 1982, in Searcy, Arkansas. He grew up in a small town called Biscoe on the banks of the White River. He graduated from DeValls Bluff High School in 2000 and was voted "Most likely to be mauled by Bigfoot", by his classmates. He still resides in Arkansas with his wife and two children, and has not yet been mauled by Bigfoot.

Frankly funny story...


Blog Posted:1/10/2014 2:13:00 PM
  Ok, like Cyndi said, we are missing Frank's humor right now so here's a goofy little story for you. Not clever, or all that funny really...but if you'd seen it, you'd have never forgotten.
  So most of you have read stories of mine involving my brother, Micah, and I (usually hunting), but I have a younger brother also. His name is Jordan. We share ten acres, on which we raise animals.(It's not a business, but we do sell the pigs we don't need...and by need, I mean the ones we don't use for meat or breeding) As of now we have over 120 chickens, 10 ducks, 3 turkeys, 6 or 7 geese, 2 goats, 9 pigs, and one old, cranky mule named Lester. No, we don't need a mule. We just took him a year ago from someone who was giving him away ... now I see why they didn't want him. He's a real jerk. Anyway, last April, Lester knocked down the fence to the pen where we keep Hairy Larry, a 400 lb boar we use to breed our sows, Wilma and Sugar-Butt (don't ask). I received a call at 3:10 pm that day from the sheriff department informing me that Hairy Larry was raising hell at the school crossing. I'm not kidding, people. We're that country. Being a small town, the cops knew exactly who's pig he was and since our ten acres is only 3 miles outside of town, Hairy Larry had no trouble getting there. I was at work so I called Jordan and he met me there with our pig trailer. Lucky for us, Wilma and Sugar-Butt, had stayed put. Lester, who had escaped his own enclosure before loosing Hairy Larry, showed back up late that evening. I was hoping he wouldn't come back. Anyway, we were met at the school crossing with angry cops, gawking pedestrians, and high school kids snapping off pictures with i-phones. Hairy Larry had decided to plant his 400 lb butt right in the middle of main street, and nobody would come near him. In truth, he was scared and surrounded by people. He didn't know what to do so he just stayed put. Normally, he would load right into the trailer for us, but not this day. We couldn't even lure him in with sour corn. So, in the end, I did the only thing I could to get him in the trailer....I sang to him. Hairy Larry will follow me anywhere when I sing, because I sing when I feed him...probably not because I have the voice of an angel...haha, though, I can carry a tune. Was I embarrased? Yes. Were crowds of high school kids giggling and gawkers gawking? Yes. Did Hairy Larry load his fat butt into the trailer? Why, yes, he surely did. 
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  1. Date: 1/11/2014 1:42:00 AM
    Very funny..I'm reading and imaging all this in my mind : )

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:26:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    it was quite an afternoon...;)
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 11:19:00 PM
    Hey, Caleb. This is hilarious. I have a question: How much are you asking for one of your sows ... ehem ... not Wilma ... : D

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:19:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Lol...sorry, Ruben. Sugar-Butt is my best sow...but maybe I could rent her out...hahaha
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 8:30:00 PM
    Good one!

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:26:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    thanks Roy
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 8:26:00 PM
    You made me smile...............SKAT

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:25:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Skat. glad to make ya smile!
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 7:25:00 PM
    What a wonderful story! I have stories from my families chicken farm! LOL

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:25:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    gotta love those chickens, huh?!
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 5:52:00 PM
    a fantastic personal story, Caleb. You are one crazy and unique guy, just like our Frank!!

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:24:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    haha...you gotta entertain yourself out in the boonies!
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 5:05:00 PM
    ha, Caleb, you are one of a kind.... Keeping the love, and spreading the joy... Luv~ Linda

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:21:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Linda...you're great...:)
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 4:53:00 PM
    - HAVE A NICE WEEKEND !!! - <3

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:20:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    You too, Anne!
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 4:40:00 PM
    The best Caleb!

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:20:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Craig
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 2:31:00 PM
    just goes to show you have a hypnotic voice, caleb... a fun blog for the weekend with hopes that frank is reading this,, huggs

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:17:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    hmmm...maybe I do..ha
  1. Date: 1/10/2014 2:18:00 PM
    OMG... Priceless! Love the names of your animals and your errant mule Lester. Frankly Frank will love this too! You need to write more stories LOL

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 1/11/2014 2:16:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Karen..:)
    cornish Avatar craig cornish Date: 1/10/2014 4:41:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Karen, hope yur ok hon!!

My Past Blog Posts

 
Inappropriate church behavior ... a funny story or two
Date Posted: 5/28/2014 8:46:00 AM
Wassup y'all?
Date Posted: 4/15/2014 10:11:00 AM
Pictures. Me at 5 and others
Date Posted: 3/17/2014 11:32:00 AM
Fishin' contest closed, fishin' haibun, and nonsense as usual
Date Posted: 3/10/2014 10:57:00 AM
21 Cyclists, two hillbillies, and a deer on an ear...
Date Posted: 2/27/2014 2:05:00 PM
Gone Fishin' Contest
Date Posted: 2/19/2014 8:36:00 AM
Donkey Basketball
Date Posted: 2/18/2014 10:05:00 AM
Into The Wild ... And Back Again
Date Posted: 2/10/2014 11:09:00 AM
In honor of the crown
Date Posted: 2/7/2014 12:09:00 PM
Re-telling of the naked hunter...and other stories
Date Posted: 1/26/2014 3:36:00 PM
Honoring Levon Helm... Singer, Songwriter, Legend among the greatest
Date Posted: 1/20/2014 2:32:00 PM
Where do you find peace?
Date Posted: 1/13/2014 11:22:00 AM
Frankly funny story...
Date Posted: 1/10/2014 2:13:00 PM
The Guest
Date Posted: 1/2/2014 12:46:00 PM
Southern Expressions....??
Date Posted: 11/4/2013 2:17:00 PM
Contest prize photos up
Date Posted: 10/1/2013 11:43:00 AM
Contest Judged ... Finally
Date Posted: 9/30/2013 11:26:00 AM
New Contest Posted--In the Woods
Date Posted: 9/2/2013 8:46:00 AM
Poetry and Fishing
Date Posted: 6/25/2013 10:24:00 AM
No idea what I'm doing...
Date Posted: 6/17/2013 10:59:00 AM

My Recent Poems

Date PostedPoem TitleFormCategories
7/30/2014The WholeFree verseintrospection,pain,
7/29/2014Elly JaneRhymeangel,birth,death,faith,f
5/28/2014Charge ItFree verseworld,
4/24/2014Dark ReflectionsRhymeconflict,
3/25/2014Jessie on the DrawbridgeNarrativededication,
3/18/2014To Those of PoetrySoupFree versededication,
2/26/2014Song Of My BackLight Poetryfather daughter,
1/22/2014A Stone in the ColdSonnetpassion,
1/7/2014I amFree versedepression,
12/13/2013My Daughter So SweetRhymebirth,birthday,
12/10/2013Seventh SummerFree versechildhood,
12/3/2013Melody of the LostFree versepoetry,
9/11/2013Black Lake - RevisitedNarrativechildhood,
9/11/2013Black Lake -- IntroNarrativechildhood,
9/4/2013Black LakeNarrativechildhood,
8/20/2013Can-ManFree versedeath,
6/17/2013A Sack For Every OccasionLight Poetrypollution,
6/11/2013The Ghost DreamNarrativedream,
6/10/2013Annoyed At WorkLight Poetrywork,
6/6/2013RobinwoodQuatrainnature,
6/3/2013Return To Slippery Lake BridgeNarrativefishing,
6/3/2013Why Not WhyLight Poetryconfusion,
6/3/2013The Old Man and MeFree versememory,
6/3/2013Nectar of the PoisonousFree versecorruption,
6/3/2013Meanest Snake AliveLight Poetryfishing,
5/17/2013NothingFree verseemotions,
5/13/2013Two CedarsRhymetree,
5/9/2013Stories of Shenzhen--Part TwoNarrativecrazy,
5/8/2013CamouflageQuatraincolor,
5/6/2013The Hunter--Part TwoNarrativeanimal,death,food,
5/6/2013The Hunter--Part OneNarrativeanimal,
5/6/2013Stories of Shenzhen--Part OneNarrativefear,religious,travel,
5/3/2013Stories of Guangzhou--Part OneNarrativebrother,travel,
5/3/2013Chance of FateFree versewife,
4/30/2013Stories of Beijing--Part TwoNarrativechristian,travel,
4/30/2013Stories of Beijing--Part OneNarrativetravel,
4/27/2013B-ListSenryufunny,
4/25/2013TakenRhymeconfusion,
4/22/2013A Dream Last NightNarrativedream,
4/19/2013A FriendFree versefriend,
4/19/2013See No Morph--Hear No MorphHaikufish,nature,
4/18/2013First ImpressionsNarrativelust,
4/16/2013Alone in Good CompanyFree verseintrospection,
4/15/2013The WrathNarrativewrite,god,god,hate,
4/15/2013Moments of SilenceFree versebusiness,hate,
4/12/2013What the Current TakesFree versedeath,dog,memory,friend,o
4/12/2013Til' Death Do We PartLight Poetrywife,me,me,
4/12/2013The FoolFree versewife,
4/12/2013Hai-TideHaikuocean,
4/11/2013Scarin' Hippies- Part TwoProse Poetryadventure,brother,funny,g
4/10/2013Scarin' Hippies- Part OneProse Poetryadventure,brother,funny,p
4/10/2013Arkansas SnowballsCoupletchildhood,funny,
4/8/2013MoonRhymefunny,love,moon,
4/8/2013Queens of the SoupRhymededication,poets,
4/4/2013The StrangerFree versepeople,thanksgiving,
4/3/2013The FarmerFree versepeople,
4/3/2013Jacky TobackyLimerickfunny,
4/3/2013Scooby-Doo and ShaggyRhymehumorous,
4/1/2013The Fall of BiscoeHaibunchildhood,nostalgia,summe
4/1/2013Goodnight JillybugLyricfather daughter,for child
3/26/2013Echoes of the HeartProsebaseball,
3/26/2013Holding SandProsedeath,dream,daughter,wife
3/25/2013Time For TeeLimerickhumorous,
3/22/2013Bob and BillRhymefunny,
3/22/2013After WakingFree verseconfusion,dream,
3/22/2013ReflectionCoupletintrospection,me,
3/21/2013Mr McCaleb's GardenRhymenature,
3/20/2013A Kiss of SunshineHaikunature,
3/19/2013Bucket ListCoupletlife,me,me,
3/19/2013Remembering My Third KOLight Poetrychildhood,memory,pain,
3/19/2013Remembering My Second KOLight Poetrychildhood,memory,pain,
3/18/2013Remembering My First KOLight Poetrymemory,pain,
3/18/2013Go Ahead And Pinch SuckaHaikuhumorous,
3/14/2013Bubble BathLight Poetryfunny,
3/14/2013BoogersLight Poetryfunny,
3/13/2013Fatty GrasshopperLight Poetryhumorous,me,
3/12/2013All AboardFree versebeauty,women,
3/11/2013Pieces of PeaceRhymepeace,me,
3/5/2013Stepping Over StonesFree verselife,
3/1/2013All Hands On DeckLimerickhumorous,
2/28/2013Wesson's BendCoupletnature,sun,
2/27/2013Bound To Be FreeRhymelife,men,
2/25/2013All Tied UpMonokuhumorous,
2/25/2013Moon is my MuseMonokumoon,
2/25/2013Pale Moon NightSestinalonely,moon,
2/25/2013Bunnies n' GravyCouplethumorous,
2/21/2013Indians In My BedLight Poetryhumorous,
2/19/2013Haiku DreamsHaikutime,
2/13/2013WarVersewar,
2/12/2013Hell's AlcoholRhymedepression,anger,
2/10/2013Field of VisionRhymenature,
2/8/2013Dawn's FingerCoupletnature,
2/8/2013Silent SageKimonature,
2/8/2013Blow Me A KissHaikulove,
1/31/2013River FogHaikunature,
1/31/2013Darkness Rides AgainBlank versedark,
1/25/2013TroubledFree versedepression,life,
1/13/2013AlmostSenryuhumorous,
1/1/2013GenaRhymedeath,
1/1/2013Cheung ChauCouplettravel,

My Photos


ps_pics 063.jpg

Fav Poems

Poem TitleFormCategories
glad you're goneHaikunature,people,
ThunderRhymechildhood,nature,
Effervescent EyesVerseimagination,
skeletal treesHaikunature,
WHEN SUNSET BLEEDSQuintain (English)hope,nature,
The Bluest SkyRhymefaith,forgiveness,
ACHES OF A BOWLyricmusic,nostalgia,
Petals in the WindQuatrainnature,
Cinder GirlRhymelovelove,
CalebI do not know?family,
By All of This - Ah, Wanton BlissQuatrainromance,me,valentines day
Goodbye, My ChildRhymeadventure,allegory,angel,
I BurnRhymelove,sorrow,
Crescent WitnessTankalove
Nana's GardenHaibunchildhood,family,house,ga
The LocketFree versememory,
Battling AddictionShapecourage,me,me,
BackwardAcrosticlife,
Those Old Cold Men of the WoodsDodoitsume,nature,
While My Guitar Gently WeepsQuatrainlove,
Where The Sycamore GrewFree verseautumn,family,house,life,
In Strangler's WoodRhymedeath,
Summer's InterludeFree versenatureautumn,
Love Beyond the PaleQuatraindevotion,lost love,
FORGOTTEN TREASURE-Light Poetrybeauty,growing up,inspira
The WellRhymeallegory,water,water,
The ReturnFree versechildhood,
goodbye, sweet dayThan-Bauknature,
Summer ButterfliesTankahappiness,
Summer MorningCoupletlife,nature,
Baby BraveQuatrainfear,life,war,
Love and MarriageFree verselove,
Nothing RemainsFree verseintrospection,life,me,hea
HANDS THAT DIPPED MEFree versefathers day,inspiration,m
Mountain StormDodoitsunature,
FeathersQuestionkunature,
Take the ribbon from my hairLight Poetrydad,love,autumn,
Timeless LoveRhymefamily,life,love,marriage
MY AFRICA, UNITE TO REWRITE HER STORYKyrielleafrica,dedication,hope,pa
Elvira And The PillowFree versehumorous,life,car,
The SilenceFree versespiritualme,home,home,me,
Golfers BewareLimericksports,
VirginiaFree versebeautiful,old,summer,old,
FirefliesHaibunlove,nature,me,light,ligh
A Bed of Pink PetalsSonnetspring,tree,
Eleventh, MarchFree versededication,hope,tribute,
When the Flowers of Youth FellFree verseseasons,time,war,
Five Great Limerick GuysLimerickdedication,humorous,
Five StarsQuatraindedication,poems,
Under the Sakura TreeHaikunature,
Sweet DreamsQuintain (English)adventure,fantasy,prayer,
Haiku 40 till Haiku 47 beneath the sakura treeHaikuspring
Show Me Your FaceVersecaregiving,love,me,me,
Welcome to the Funny FarmI do not know?animal,fun,funny,me,
The PhilosopherRhymemetaphor,
Between the Lines of Poetry SoupCoupletjealousy,lyric,passion,po
Poet's ImpasseVersepoetry,words,writing,
ImagineFree verseearth,imagination,
Violet, My AdoredFree versecolor,
The Wisdom of the BreezeHaibuninspiration,nature,writin
Hot Tear DropI do not know?lost love
Why I WeepItalian Sonnetnatureme,
To ElizabethNarrativechildhood,dedication,girl
Uncle JimFree verselost love,nostalgia,seaso
A Twisted TreeHaikunature,philosophy,
Darkest of TimesFree versedark,
No AnswersFree versefriend,
NothingFree verseemotions,
- Alcoholic - The lion roarsVerselife,sad,
Where The Wind BlowsCoupletnature,wind,
If I Was the RainFree verseintrospection,rain,
An ABC Love SongABCdevotion,love,
Raindrop ButterfliesHaibunnew year,
Just a note-Humbleness is a virtueRhymecaregiving,
Feline AlertFree verseadventure,beauty,body,cow
Remembering WhenRhymememory,people,violence,
FacebookHaibunlife,
A FORMal EveningLight Poetryfun,
To a Weeping WillowFree verseearth,grief,tree,
Unborn TomorrowsFree verseinspirational,
Night DrivingFree versecity,
I am a Child- Poem written for Restore a Child OrganizationEnclosed Rhymechild,love,rights,
Woods of EvergreenEpicadventure,allegory,epic,r
To FeelRondeauemotions,
Portrait of a LifeSonnetlove,
FANFARE, A POEM FOR CALEBSonnetbooks,friend,imagination,
Return to Wagon WheelSonnetloss,
A Stone in the Cold part 6 - runner upSonnetadventure,
Cradle My Tears, MoonFree verseloss,moon,
Am I Turning into a Lizard Serial KillerNarrativeangst,animal,how i feel,s
Between Two Shades Of NightFree versecaregiving,dedication,
The Darkness at NoonRondeaudark,

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craig cornish United States Flag United States Read
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