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Caleb Smith's Blog

About Caleb Smith
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Bloggers Photo  Caleb A. Smith was born January 14, 1982, in Searcy, Arkansas. He grew up in a small town called Biscoe on the banks of the White River. He graduated from DeValls Bluff High School in 2000 and was voted "Most likely to be mauled by Bigfoot", by his classmates. He still resides in Arkansas with his wife and two children, and has not yet been mauled by Bigfoot.

Southern Expressions....??

Blog Posted:11/4/2013 2:17:00 PM
What's up y'all? I know i haven't been around much lately ... no big loss (I mean for you good folks of the soup...not for me!...haha...wanted to be clear on that...miss y'all), but I've got a few minutes and wanted to blog about something ... just nonsense mostly. A good friend of mine from California who works for me here, is always laughing at the expressions I use. Usually, he has no idea what I'm talking about at first, but he gets a kick out of em', so I thought I'd ask the wide range of people here ...ever heard any of these? Today I told him I wanted him busier than a one-armed monkey with two peckers, which is what brought this blog on.

--It's hotter'n a billy goat's ass in a pepper patch.
--It's hotter'n two rabbits screwin' in a wool sack.
--He's windy'sa sack fulla farts (used to describe a blowhard)
--Useless as tits on a bull
--Slicker'n pig snot on a radiator (sometimes used to describe ice...or even a crafty person)
--Wadn't nuthin' tween him an the Lord 'cept a grin (he was completely naked)
--That stink would knock buzzards off a gut wagon.
--Stop goin' round yer ass to get to yer elbow. (doing things the hard way)
--That happened faster'n a knife fight in a phone booth.
--Higher than a Georgia pine (drunk or stoned)
--Madder'n a wet hen in a tote sack
--I swalla'd down my Sun'de(Sunday) throat. (to get ckoked on something)
--I'm doin' finer'n frog's hair ( finer than frog's hair...I'm doing very well)
--Good night a'livin'!! (good grief!!)

Here's a couple my great-grandmother used to say...
--If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride.
--Wake up, Caleb, yonder comes a hare with his tail ashakin'

And here's a couple of single words that Joe finds amusing...
--plumb (all the way) jar was plumb empty.
--tump (tip over and dump) that bucket of water over.
--Law! (Oh My!)
--Caddywompus ( sideways or crooked)

Ok, that's enough of that ...I could go on like this all day. I've got lots. Some of the above aren't as commonly used as others (not anymore, anyway) and certainly not all over the south, but some of these are pretty common where I'm from. Ever heard any...or variations? Have any funny ones to share that might be regional to you?
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  1. Date: 11/7/2013 5:20:00 PM
    Hey Caleb...saw your name ,had to say hey....good googly moogly you made me laugh..thanks...we talk like this so much it doesnt even seem weird to me...its been raining like a cow' on a flat rock here so I had a few minutes....take care....:-) :-) :-)

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  1. Date: 11/7/2013 7:24:00 AM
    Great blog Caleb! Yep, I'm a southern boy too and I've heard a lot but not all of them...My fav is my wife's grandma who gave her some feminine hygene advice when she was approaching puberty...'Wash everything possible, then wash possible too'...

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  1. Date: 11/6/2013 4:39:00 PM
    hahaha, I did not know even half of them. but a few I knew. So good to see you. I've been too busy to even do blogs or comment on them until today. I had commented on an old poem of yours asking where you were just ten min. ago!!

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  1. Date: 11/6/2013 12:29:00 AM
    These are right entertainin' In Australia we have a million and one slang phrases. In fact a whole dictionary is devoted to Australian Slang. We love to play with words Keeps us 'busier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.' SuZ

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  1. Date: 11/5/2013 7:24:00 AM
    Love them all. What about. " Dummer than a stump." " He don't know his butt from a hole in the ground." "He is the type of person only a mother could love." " As much fun as watching paint dry." There is more, but I gotta go. Take care.

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 11/5/2013 7:54:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Ha...yep...Dummer than a box of rocks. Thanks
  1. Date: 11/4/2013 8:56:00 PM
    You've made every-day language much more fun!!

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 11/5/2013 7:53:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Hi Carrie. Thanks
  1. Date: 11/4/2013 8:43:00 PM
    Very funny, Caleb!

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 11/5/2013 7:52:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Ruben
  1. Date: 11/4/2013 5:55:00 PM
    Miss ya'll here Caleb one I love is that in the south "War" is a two syllable word pronounced wawar. To follow up on Charma's we use "A bird in hand is worth two in the bush". Gotta run--fun blog Caleb--stay well my man!

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 11/5/2013 7:52:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Craig...You too
  1. Date: 11/4/2013 5:17:00 PM
    In maltese We have many expressions ..many of which not funny but maybe clever. Examples-Its better a bird in your hand than many in the air(means To be happy with what is yours) 2) His face and His arse are the same(usually refers for someone who is not shy of anything) 3)The bitch gives you from what she owns(meaning who does wrong..tries to imply you do that kind of wrong) 4) Think hundred times and cut one time(Don t take decisions without thinking ) There are plenty more. Your blog is very entertaining.Give us some poetry Cal..Yes : )

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    Campi Avatar Jancarl Campi Date: 11/5/2013 1:05:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 11/5/2013 7:51:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I like those...similar to one of those is a common one here...measure twice, cut once..
    Chircop Avatar Charmaine Chircop Date: 11/4/2013 5:21:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Last two~ Cut the pig `s tail..He is still a pig [means some people never change. ~If you spit in the air it falls on your face(If you try to do harm to others..that harm will turn to you).
  1. Date: 11/4/2013 4:01:00 PM
    We say 'usless as tits on a boar hog'... and 'youse guys' (in St. Louis).

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  1. Date: 11/4/2013 3:37:00 PM
    So funny LOL :)

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  1. Date: 11/4/2013 3:00:00 PM
    LMAO I loved this, Caleb! I'm from Kentucky, so I've heard my fair share of "southernisms". I live in the Appalachians, which is about as country as you can get. Some of these I've heard and others in slight variations. Were you "tard" after a'writin' all that? (tired lol; I know you know what I meant, though.) You've got me all "farr'd" up now! (fired lol.) This was so much fun to read as a fellow southerner. Where ya from, 'zactly? Hope ta hear from ya drekly (after while; my papaw always said "drekly".) You 'xpectin' iny kumpny tanight? Ya busier than a one-legged man in an ass whoopin' contest? Better check the "awl" in yer car (oil) before you go a rippin' an' a runnin'! lol Thanks!

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    Ryerson Avatar Tim Ryerson Date: 11/7/2013 7:33:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    'The work we done was hard, at night we'd sleep 'cause we were tard'...Loretta Lynn - 'Coal Miner's Daughter'
    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 11/4/2013 3:55:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    And you're right ... what you wrote sounds as smooth to me as talkin' to myself...haha.
    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 11/4/2013 3:49:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    But depending on where you are in Arkansas, accents and culture can be very different. Due to the location we have a lot of Cajun influence, Southwestern, Midwestern, and deep southern influence. Very diversified...
    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 11/4/2013 3:46:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Oh yea, I've spent some time in the Appalachians (turkey hunting) and there are some DEEP accents there(very charming), as well as some of the most beautiful countryside you're ever likely to see. I'm from Arkansas, near the foothills of the Ozarks...folks here have very similar accents and expressions to those in the Appalachians.

My Past Blog Posts

Inappropriate church behavior ... a funny story or two
Date Posted: 5/28/2014 8:46:00 AM
Wassup y'all?
Date Posted: 4/15/2014 10:11:00 AM
Pictures. Me at 5 and others
Date Posted: 3/17/2014 11:32:00 AM
Fishin' contest closed, fishin' haibun, and nonsense as usual
Date Posted: 3/10/2014 10:57:00 AM
21 Cyclists, two hillbillies, and a deer on an ear...
Date Posted: 2/27/2014 2:05:00 PM
Gone Fishin' Contest
Date Posted: 2/19/2014 8:36:00 AM
Donkey Basketball
Date Posted: 2/18/2014 10:05:00 AM
Into The Wild ... And Back Again
Date Posted: 2/10/2014 11:09:00 AM
In honor of the crown
Date Posted: 2/7/2014 12:09:00 PM
Re-telling of the naked hunter...and other stories
Date Posted: 1/26/2014 3:36:00 PM
Honoring Levon Helm... Singer, Songwriter, Legend among the greatest
Date Posted: 1/20/2014 2:32:00 PM
Where do you find peace?
Date Posted: 1/13/2014 11:22:00 AM
Frankly funny story...
Date Posted: 1/10/2014 2:13:00 PM
The Guest
Date Posted: 1/2/2014 12:46:00 PM
Southern Expressions....??
Date Posted: 11/4/2013 2:17:00 PM
Contest prize photos up
Date Posted: 10/1/2013 11:43:00 AM
Contest Judged ... Finally
Date Posted: 9/30/2013 11:26:00 AM
New Contest Posted--In the Woods
Date Posted: 9/2/2013 8:46:00 AM
Poetry and Fishing
Date Posted: 6/25/2013 10:24:00 AM
No idea what I'm doing...
Date Posted: 6/17/2013 10:59:00 AM

My Recent Poems

Date PostedPoem TitleFormCategories
7/30/2014The WholeFree verseintrospection,pain,
7/29/2014Elly JaneRhymeangel,birth,death,faith,f
5/28/2014Charge ItFree verseworld,
4/24/2014Dark ReflectionsRhymeconflict,
3/25/2014Jessie on the DrawbridgeNarrativededication,
3/18/2014To Those of PoetrySoupFree versededication,
2/26/2014Song Of My BackLight Poetryfather daughter,
1/22/2014A Stone in the ColdSonnetpassion,
1/7/2014I amFree versedepression,
12/13/2013My Daughter So SweetRhymebirth,birthday,
12/10/2013Seventh SummerFree versechildhood,
12/3/2013Melody of the LostFree versepoetry,
9/11/2013Black Lake - RevisitedNarrativechildhood,
9/11/2013Black Lake -- IntroNarrativechildhood,
9/4/2013Black LakeNarrativechildhood,
8/20/2013Can-ManFree versedeath,
6/17/2013A Sack For Every OccasionLight Poetrypollution,
6/11/2013The Ghost DreamNarrativedream,
6/10/2013Annoyed At WorkLight Poetrywork,
6/3/2013Return To Slippery Lake BridgeNarrativefishing,
6/3/2013Why Not WhyLight Poetryconfusion,
6/3/2013The Old Man and MeFree versememory,
6/3/2013Nectar of the PoisonousFree versecorruption,
6/3/2013Meanest Snake AliveLight Poetryfishing,
5/17/2013NothingFree verseemotions,
5/13/2013Two CedarsRhymetree,
5/9/2013Stories of Shenzhen--Part TwoNarrativecrazy,
5/6/2013The Hunter--Part TwoNarrativeanimal,death,food,
5/6/2013The Hunter--Part OneNarrativeanimal,
5/6/2013Stories of Shenzhen--Part OneNarrativefear,religious,travel,
5/3/2013Stories of Guangzhou--Part OneNarrativebrother,travel,
5/3/2013Chance of FateFree versewife,
4/30/2013Stories of Beijing--Part TwoNarrativechristian,travel,
4/30/2013Stories of Beijing--Part OneNarrativetravel,
4/22/2013A Dream Last NightNarrativedream,
4/19/2013A FriendFree versefriend,
4/19/2013See No Morph--Hear No MorphHaikufish,nature,
4/18/2013First ImpressionsNarrativelust,
4/16/2013Alone in Good CompanyFree verseintrospection,
4/15/2013The WrathNarrativewrite,god,god,hate,
4/15/2013Moments of SilenceFree versebusiness,hate,
4/12/2013What the Current TakesFree versedeath,dog,memory,friend,o
4/12/2013Til' Death Do We PartLight Poetrywife,me,me,
4/12/2013The FoolFree versewife,
4/11/2013Scarin' Hippies- Part TwoProse Poetryadventure,brother,funny,g
4/10/2013Scarin' Hippies- Part OneProse Poetryadventure,brother,funny,p
4/10/2013Arkansas SnowballsCoupletchildhood,funny,
4/8/2013Queens of the SoupRhymededication,poets,
4/4/2013The StrangerFree versepeople,thanksgiving,
4/3/2013The FarmerFree versepeople,
4/3/2013Jacky TobackyLimerickfunny,
4/3/2013Scooby-Doo and ShaggyRhymehumorous,
4/1/2013The Fall of BiscoeHaibunchildhood,nostalgia,summe
4/1/2013Goodnight JillybugLyricfather daughter,for child
3/26/2013Echoes of the HeartProsebaseball,
3/26/2013Holding SandProsedeath,dream,daughter,wife
3/25/2013Time For TeeLimerickhumorous,
3/22/2013Bob and BillRhymefunny,
3/22/2013After WakingFree verseconfusion,dream,
3/21/2013Mr McCaleb's GardenRhymenature,
3/20/2013A Kiss of SunshineHaikunature,
3/19/2013Bucket ListCoupletlife,me,me,
3/19/2013Remembering My Third KOLight Poetrychildhood,memory,pain,
3/19/2013Remembering My Second KOLight Poetrychildhood,memory,pain,
3/18/2013Remembering My First KOLight Poetrymemory,pain,
3/18/2013Go Ahead And Pinch SuckaHaikuhumorous,
3/14/2013Bubble BathLight Poetryfunny,
3/14/2013BoogersLight Poetryfunny,
3/13/2013Fatty GrasshopperLight Poetryhumorous,me,
3/12/2013All AboardFree versebeauty,women,
3/11/2013Pieces of PeaceRhymepeace,me,
3/5/2013Stepping Over StonesFree verselife,
3/1/2013All Hands On DeckLimerickhumorous,
2/28/2013Wesson's BendCoupletnature,sun,
2/27/2013Bound To Be FreeRhymelife,men,
2/25/2013All Tied UpMonokuhumorous,
2/25/2013Moon is my MuseMonokumoon,
2/25/2013Pale Moon NightSestinalonely,moon,
2/25/2013Bunnies n' GravyCouplethumorous,
2/21/2013Indians In My BedLight Poetryhumorous,
2/19/2013Haiku DreamsHaikutime,
2/12/2013Hell's AlcoholRhymedepression,anger,
2/10/2013Field of VisionRhymenature,
2/8/2013Dawn's FingerCoupletnature,
2/8/2013Silent SageKimonature,
2/8/2013Blow Me A KissHaikulove,
1/31/2013River FogHaikunature,
1/31/2013Darkness Rides AgainBlank versedark,
1/25/2013TroubledFree versedepression,life,
1/1/2013Cheung ChauCouplettravel,

My Photos

ps_pics 063.jpg

Fav Poems

Poem TitleFormCategories
glad you're goneHaikunature,people,
Effervescent EyesVerseimagination,
skeletal treesHaikunature,
WHEN SUNSET BLEEDSQuintain (English)hope,nature,
The Bluest SkyRhymefaith,forgiveness,
ACHES OF A BOWLyricmusic,nostalgia,
Petals in the WindQuatrainnature,
Cinder GirlRhymelovelove,
CalebI do not know?family,
By All of This - Ah, Wanton BlissQuatrainromance,me,valentines day
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I BurnRhymelove,sorrow,
Crescent WitnessTankalove
Nana's GardenHaibunchildhood,family,house,ga
The LocketFree versememory,
Battling AddictionShapecourage,me,me,
Those Old Cold Men of the WoodsDodoitsume,nature,
While My Guitar Gently WeepsQuatrainlove,
Where The Sycamore GrewFree verseautumn,family,house,life,
In Strangler's WoodRhymedeath,
Summer's InterludeFree versenatureautumn,
Love Beyond the PaleQuatraindevotion,lost love,
FORGOTTEN TREASURE-Light Poetrybeauty,growing up,inspira
The WellRhymeallegory,water,water,
The ReturnFree versechildhood,
goodbye, sweet dayThan-Bauknature,
Summer ButterfliesTankahappiness,
Summer MorningCoupletlife,nature,
Baby BraveQuatrainfear,life,war,
Love and MarriageFree verselove,
Nothing RemainsFree verseintrospection,life,me,hea
HANDS THAT DIPPED MEFree versefathers day,inspiration,m
Mountain StormDodoitsunature,
Take the ribbon from my hairLight Poetrydad,love,autumn,
Timeless LoveRhymefamily,life,love,marriage
MY AFRICA, UNITE TO REWRITE HER STORYKyrielleafrica,dedication,hope,pa
Elvira And The PillowFree versehumorous,life,car,
The SilenceFree versespiritualme,home,home,me,
Golfers BewareLimericksports,
VirginiaFree versebeautiful,old,summer,old,
A Bed of Pink PetalsSonnetspring,tree,
Eleventh, MarchFree versededication,hope,tribute,
When the Flowers of Youth FellFree verseseasons,time,war,
Five Great Limerick GuysLimerickdedication,humorous,
Five StarsQuatraindedication,poems,
Under the Sakura TreeHaikunature,
Sweet DreamsQuintain (English)adventure,fantasy,prayer,
Haiku 40 till Haiku 47 beneath the sakura treeHaikuspring
Show Me Your FaceVersecaregiving,love,me,me,
Welcome to the Funny FarmI do not know?animal,fun,funny,me,
The PhilosopherRhymemetaphor,
Between the Lines of Poetry SoupCoupletjealousy,lyric,passion,po
Poet's ImpasseVersepoetry,words,writing,
ImagineFree verseearth,imagination,
Violet, My AdoredFree versecolor,
The Wisdom of the BreezeHaibuninspiration,nature,writin
Hot Tear DropI do not know?lost love
Why I WeepItalian Sonnetnatureme,
To ElizabethNarrativechildhood,dedication,girl
Uncle JimFree verselost love,nostalgia,seaso
A Twisted TreeHaikunature,philosophy,
Darkest of TimesFree versedark,
No AnswersFree versefriend,
NothingFree verseemotions,
- Alcoholic - The lion roarsVerselife,sad,
Where The Wind BlowsCoupletnature,wind,
If I Was the RainFree verseintrospection,rain,
An ABC Love SongABCdevotion,love,
Raindrop ButterfliesHaibunnew year,
Just a note-Humbleness is a virtueRhymecaregiving,
Feline AlertFree verseadventure,beauty,body,cow
Remembering WhenRhymememory,people,violence,
A FORMal EveningLight Poetryfun,
To a Weeping WillowFree verseearth,grief,tree,
Unborn TomorrowsFree verseinspirational,
Night DrivingFree versecity,
I am a Child- Poem written for Restore a Child OrganizationEnclosed Rhymechild,love,rights,
Woods of EvergreenEpicadventure,allegory,epic,r
To FeelRondeauemotions,
Portrait of a LifeSonnetlove,
FANFARE, A POEM FOR CALEBSonnetbooks,friend,imagination,
Return to Wagon WheelSonnetloss,
A Stone in the Cold part 6 - runner upSonnetadventure,
Cradle My Tears, MoonFree verseloss,moon,
Am I Turning into a Lizard Serial KillerNarrativeangst,animal,how i feel,s
Between Two Shades Of NightFree versecaregiving,dedication,
The Darkness at NoonRondeaudark,

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