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Mandy Tams The Golden Girl's Blog

About Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
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I don't want you to get bored looking at me and hubby in the garden last year, so I'll show it to you in the daylight, my refuge where the foxes wander.
There is not much that many of you don't know about me now, I enjoy a good laugh and if I can find one I will. If I can make someone smile my day is complete. I enjoy people and people watching but do not suffer fools easily, mainly because my dad told me I would be one when I grew up, and I think he may have been right.
I was born in Yorkshire and the extended family are still there but we now live in Staffordshire, we being my husband of 33 years and our two sons, well one of them has left and lives with his partner a girl whom we love dearly.
My latest hobby is writing and from this I am learning a great deal from and about people, that write.
My latest, latest thing to keep me occupied is making myself a nice new fleece top, it's getting cold and my old one; which must be 12 years old has had to be sent to a better place and I miss it already RIP>


Most Recent Blog Post

The Things doctors ay and the things they really mean.
Blog Posted:6/30/2013 12:12:00 PM


I have learnt quite a bit more form my resent hospital stay and would like to pass on some of my knowledge to help you all in understanding what a Doctor is actually saying

Dr “This should be taken care of right away.”
- I’d planned a trip to Hawaii next month, but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures itself.

 Dr  “Well, what do we have here…?”
- He has no idea and is hoping you’ll give him a clue.

 Dr “Let me check your medical history.”
- I want to see if you’ve paid your last bill before spending anymore time with you.

 Dr “Why don’t we make another appointment later in the week.”
- I’m playing golf this afternoon, and this is a waste of time.
- or-
- I need the bucks, so I’m charging you for another office visit.

Dr “We have some good news and some bad news.”
- The good news is, I’m going to buy that new BMW. The bad news is, you’re going to pay for it.

Dr “Let’s see how it develops.”
- Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that can be cured.

Dr “Let me schedule you for some tests.”
- I have a forty percent interest in the lab.

Dr “I’d like to have my associate look at you.”
- He’s going through a messy divorce and owes me a bundle.

Dr “I’d like to prescribe a new drug.”
- I’m writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig.

Dr “If it doesn’t clear up in a week, give me a call.”
- I don’t know what it is. Maybe it will go away by itself.

Dr “That’s quite a nasty looking wound.”
- I think I’m going to throw up.

Dr “This may smart a little.”
- Last week two patients bit off their tongues.

Dr “Well, we’re not feeling so well today, are we…?”
- I’m stalling for time. Who are you and why are you here?

dr “This should fix you up.”
- The drug company slipped me some big bucks to prescribe this stuff.

Dr “Everything seems to be normal.”
- Rats! I guess I can’t buy that new beach condo after all.

Dr “I’d like to run some more tests.”
- I can’t figure out what’s wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one.

Dr “There is a lot of that going around.”
- That’s the third one this week. I’d better learn something about this.

Dr “If the symptoms persist, call for an appointment.”
- I’ve never heard of anything so disgusting. Glad I’m off next week.

All joking aside a huge thank you to all the medical staff that have just given me excellent care and are all helping me back on the road to recovery, even the bad paramedic who had to apologise when he realised I was in fact very ill and not just the nuisance call he thought it was, Thanks Sam, told you I was ill lol xx

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  1. Date: 7/3/2013 9:45:00 PM
    Laughter is the best medicine!! Hope I don't OD...Couldn't resist adding to my fav one...Doctor: We're not feeling so well today are we?...Mandy: You sick too doc?

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    Ryerson Avatar Tim Ryerson Date: 7/3/2013 9:48:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    So glad you are feeling better and out of the hospital too!
  1. Date: 7/1/2013 4:46:00 PM
    ;-D Love Ya

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  1. Date: 7/1/2013 12:37:00 PM
    did you go to medical school cause I swear this is exactly what they study.I am glad you are feeling better and jokes like this will help heal the soul.Love Colleen

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  1. Date: 7/1/2013 9:58:00 AM
    ~GG~ I am so glad to hear you are on the mend!! Your post is too funny. Lol. I miss and love you bunches!! Cap'n Deb

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  1. Date: 7/1/2013 6:51:00 AM
    This is sooo funny! Glad to hear that you are doing better. love and hugs, catie :)

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  1. Date: 7/1/2013 1:05:00 AM
    excellent humor as aint seen crapola medicine till you ve seen russian .......i could go on at extreme length , but suffice to say i would take one of your dodgy medics in UK ( or , Andrea, ANY medic any time in the US) instead of the guys here........keep on laughing Mandy its the best medicine....

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  1. Date: 6/30/2013 11:38:00 PM
    This gave me a laugh. Thanks. There are some goo MDs out there

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  1. Date: 6/30/2013 8:16:00 PM
    and you are not even in the United states. Wow, this is amazing!!! (I have not found a decent dr. yet)

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  1. Date: 6/30/2013 7:12:00 PM
    wow it's very scary to be that suspicious of your own Dr. the one YOU chose?

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  1. Date: 6/30/2013 4:22:00 PM
    We missed you Mandy, glad your on the road to recovery...Seren

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  1. Date: 6/30/2013 3:44:00 PM
    And it is so lovely to see that you still have the gift of humor and spirit........and so glad you are doing better. Thank you for the joy and laughter you bring to the rest of us! Take care, Mandy!

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My Past Blog Posts

Date Posted: 3/1/2014 1:16:00 PM
Date Posted: 2/16/2014 10:57:00 AM
Date Posted: 1/15/2014 3:36:00 AM
Get Well Soon Frank. mummy style humour for you
Date Posted: 1/11/2014 8:31:00 AM
Date Posted: 1/5/2014 4:17:00 AM
Date Posted: 12/31/2013 4:07:00 AM
Onions and Christmas Trees
Date Posted: 12/9/2013 6:46:00 AM
Flow Chart Managment
Date Posted: 11/15/2013 5:47:00 AM
Date Posted: 11/14/2013 4:50:00 AM
Date Posted: 11/11/2013 5:39:00 AM
My reaction to Spiders too
Date Posted: 11/4/2013 4:08:00 AM
Rules for dating my sons
Date Posted: 11/3/2013 6:33:00 AM
The moment you realise it's ony Tuesday.
Date Posted: 11/1/2013 7:20:00 AM
Thoughts and Thanks
Date Posted: 10/15/2013 8:45:00 AM
Cool yae or nae
Date Posted: 10/3/2013 6:48:00 AM
Date Posted: 9/12/2013 5:47:00 AM
Date Posted: 9/7/2013 3:33:00 AM
Pull Buddy Pull
Date Posted: 8/15/2013 7:38:00 AM
When A Woman says 'what'
Date Posted: 8/13/2013 7:39:00 AM
Finally found a good plumber
Date Posted: 8/5/2013 1:31:00 AM
Yes and Eys
Date Posted: 8/2/2013 10:08:00 AM
Date Posted: 8/1/2013 12:36:00 AM
Date Posted: 7/30/2013 11:36:00 AM
Fancy Cooking
Date Posted: 7/23/2013 1:02:00 AM
Toilet Humour
Date Posted: 7/16/2013 4:50:00 AM

My Poems

Date PostedPoem TitleFormCategories
3/28/2014Robin HoodQuatrainhistory,
3/26/2014From The TowpathSonnethistory,
3/23/2014Whitby 2012Versefantasy,
3/19/2014JamesOde how i feel,
2/3/2014The FatesSonnetlove,love hurts,
1/30/2014The true story Of Fanny LynesOde history,
1/16/2014Meadow SweetSonnetlove,
1/10/2014Portrait of a LifeSonnetlove,
12/19/2013To DawnRhymededication,
12/16/2013Christmas Is ConfusingRhymechristmas,
12/11/2013My Turn will ComeRhymemetaphor,
12/10/2013A Kiss Under The MistletoeQuatrainkiss,
12/10/2013Three Sure Signs Of Christmas repostRhymechristmas,
12/3/2013From John Johnson to Guy FawkesRhymehistory,holiday,
12/2/2013A Vampire's kissRhymeevil,
12/2/2013Behind Every CloudQuatrainimagination,
11/26/2013The Death of A KingVerseimage,
11/24/2013The Sweetest WordsFree versewords,
11/24/2013On An Ordinary DayVersehumor,
11/18/2013The CanalQuatrainbeauty,

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