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Mandy Tams The Golden Girl's Blog

About Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
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I don't want you to get bored looking at me and hubby in the garden last year, so I'll show it to you in the daylight, my refuge where the foxes wander.
There is not much that many of you don't know about me now, I enjoy a good laugh and if I can find one I will. If I can make someone smile my day is complete. I enjoy people and people watching but do not suffer fools easily, mainly because my dad told me I would be one when I grew up, and I think he may have been right.
I was born in Yorkshire and the extended family are still there but we now live in Staffordshire, we being my husband of 33 years and our two sons, well one of them has left and lives with his partner a girl whom we love dearly.
My latest hobby is writing and from this I am learning a great deal from and about people, that write.
My latest, latest thing to keep me occupied is making myself a nice new fleece top, it's getting cold and my old one; which must be 12 years old has had to be sent to a better place and I miss it already RIP>

 

Most Recent Blog Post


MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME WELL
Blog Posted:6/10/2013 6:44:00 AM

 


1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week." 

4. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why." 

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." 

7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." 

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." 

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?" 

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." 

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it." 

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!" 

13. My mother taught me about the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out." 

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father." 

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do." 

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home." 

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home." 

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way." 

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?" 

20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." 

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 

22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father." 

23. My mother taught me ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?" 

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand." 

25. My mother taught me JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you." 

How many of these did your mother teach? AND how many did you teach your children?

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  1. Date: 7/1/2013 12:42:00 PM
    Every single one my mother teached me.HoOkEd on FoNiCs wurks 2.Colleen

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  1. Date: 6/13/2013 9:08:00 AM
    Mandy i know all of these as personal recollections of me own dear mum long gone........................one i recall fro m school was teachers repeatedly sayin "Peck you're going downhill boy" .......they were right but they probably didnt realise the hill was going to be so long.........................mandy i love all your funny stuff it genuinely make sme laugh out loud without hesitation.....keep it coming kid

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  1. Date: 6/11/2013 12:19:00 AM
    My taught me i would be daft when grew up, well he was either right or i am still waiting to grow up xx

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  1. Date: 6/10/2013 3:56:00 PM
    Haha I know some of these Mandy ...Seren

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  1. Date: 6/10/2013 3:07:00 PM
    4..6..10..17..18..19..21..24..25 : )These were all addressed to me and to my brother same list plus 11 and 14..O giess i was luckier than him : ) Re my daughter..She s just a baby so none of d above yet :)

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    Chircop Avatar Charmaine Chircop Date: 6/10/2013 3:07:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I guess
  1. Date: 6/10/2013 8:35:00 AM
    My kid just ran all over the place... Couldn't seem to keep him home. I was forever saying if you don't stop and listen to me... You'll learn everything the hard way... And he has... For all the listening he seemed not to do... He's doing what I said now at 21 and asking my advice... before he ignores it again... But at least he's asking.

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  1. Date: 6/10/2013 8:14:00 AM
    OMG, I remember some of these when I was a kid and some I told to mine when they were little. LOL Thanks for taking us back luv. Have a wonderful day. Love always, Gail

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  1. Date: 6/10/2013 7:33:00 AM
    I heard quite a lot of these(close enough anyway) when i was a kid. One of my mother's was Driving...."you're cruisin' for a bruisin'!"....and I always seemed to get there pretty fast.

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    Smith Avatar Caleb Smith Date: 6/10/2013 9:21:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    And here's one from my dad...Decisions..."you want the thick belt or the thin one?"
  1. Date: 6/10/2013 7:33:00 AM
    Lucky for me, my kids are better behaved than i was.

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My Past Blog Posts

 
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Date Posted: 3/1/2014 1:16:00 PM
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My Poems

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Date PostedPoem TitleFormCategories
3/28/2014Robin HoodQuatrainhistory,
3/26/2014From The TowpathSonnethistory,
3/23/2014Whitby 2012Versefantasy,
3/19/2014JamesOde how i feel,
2/3/2014YesterdayAcrosticboyfriend,
2/3/2014The FatesSonnetlove,love hurts,
1/30/2014The true story Of Fanny LynesOde history,
1/16/2014Meadow SweetSonnetlove,
1/10/2014Portrait of a LifeSonnetlove,
1/8/2014KintsuroiRhymehumor,
1/8/2014YellowVersedream,
1/1/2014PEACE ON THE EARTH AND GOODWILL TO ALL MEN CHALLENGEVerseinspirational,
12/19/2013To DawnRhymededication,
12/16/2013Christmas Is ConfusingRhymechristmas,
12/11/2013My Turn will ComeRhymemetaphor,
12/10/2013A Kiss Under The MistletoeQuatrainkiss,
12/10/2013Three Sure Signs Of Christmas repostRhymechristmas,
12/7/2013EmmanuelLyricsong,
12/3/2013From John Johnson to Guy FawkesRhymehistory,holiday,
12/2/2013A Vampire's kissRhymeevil,
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