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Mandy Tams The Golden Girl's Blog

About Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
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I don't want you to get bored looking at me and hubby in the garden last year, so I'll show it to you in the daylight, my refuge where the foxes wander.
There is not much that many of you don't know about me now, I enjoy a good laugh and if I can find one I will. If I can make someone smile my day is complete. I enjoy people and people watching but do not suffer fools easily, mainly because my dad told me I would be one when I grew up, and I think he may have been right.
I was born in Yorkshire and the extended family are still there but we now live in Staffordshire, we being my husband of 33 years and our two sons, well one of them has left and lives with his partner a girl whom we love dearly.
My latest hobby is writing and from this I am learning a great deal from and about people, that write.
My latest, latest thing to keep me occupied is making myself a nice new fleece top, it's getting cold and my old one; which must be 12 years old has had to be sent to a better place and I miss it already RIP>

 

Most Recent Blog Post


Stupid Warning Labels
Blog Posted:12/8/2012 4:25:00 AM

 

Warning on a bottle of drain cleaner: "If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions, cautions and warnings, do not use this product." 

That warning is the first place winner of the 2004 Wacky Warning Label Contest. The Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch, a group whose goal is to show that the fear of frivolous lawsuits has led to a loss of corporate common sense, sponsors the annual contest for the wackiest warning labels. 

"Wacky warning labels are a sign of our lawsuit-plagued times," Robert B. Dorigo Jones, president of the nonprofit Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch group, said in the news release announcing the contest winners. "It used to be that if someone spilled coffee in their lap, they simply called themselves clumsy. Today, too many people are calling themselves an attorney." 

Second place: On a snow sled: "Beware: sled may develop high speed under certain snow conditions." 

Third place: On a 12-inch-high storage rack for compact discs: "Do not use as a ladder." 

Fourth place: A 5-inch fishing lure with three nasty steel hooks advises it is "Harmful if swallowed." Too bad fish can't read! 

Previous winners in the "Wacky Warning Label Contest" are presented here for your amusement and amazement: 

* A warning on an electric router made for carpenters cautions, "This product not intended for use as a dental drill." 

* A warning label found on a baby stroller cautions the user: "Remove child before folding." 

* A bottle of prescription sleeping pills says, "Warning: May cause drowsiness." 

* A sticker on a toilet at a public facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan actually warns: "Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking." 

* A CD player carries this unusual warning: "Do not use the Ultradisc2000 as a projectile in a catapult." 

* An "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter cautions, "Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks." 

* A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use "while sleeping or unconscious." 

* A container of underarm deodorant says, "Caution: Do not spray in eyes." 

* A cartridge for a laser printer warns, "Do not eat toner." 

* A household iron warns users: "Never iron clothes while they are being worn." 

* A label with a hair dryer reads, "Never use hair dryer while sleeping." 

* A 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow warns: "Not intended for highway use." 

* A cardboard car sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard warns, "Do not drive with sunshield in place." 

* A bathroom heater says: "This product is not to be used in bathrooms." 

* A can of self-defense pepper spray warns users: "May irritate eyes." 

* A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists says: "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." 

* A popular manufactured fireplace log warns: "Caution: Risk of Fire." 

* A box of birthday cake candles says: "DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity." 

* "Do not use snow blower on the roof." 

* "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher." 
Please Login to post a comment
 
  1. Date: 12/13/2012 3:12:00 PM
    A Swedish chainsaw's warning label read "Warning: Attempting to stop chainsaw with hands, face or genitalia will cause serious bodily harm."

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  1. Date: 12/9/2012 6:16:00 AM
    LOL, had a good chuckle at these : )

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    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 12/9/2012 6:55:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Then I am happy Jack, hugs to you Sue and Dawn xx
  1. Date: 12/8/2012 12:49:00 PM
    Dear Mandy, Hope this finds YOU and YOURS Healthy and High in the Spirit. I thought of how many times I have seen stupid warning signs. I have become a fan of Mandy's Laugh of the day LOVE the blog LOVE YOU always and FOREVER YOUR Eternal (Young) Liege...Harry

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    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 12/9/2012 6:54:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Harry that means a lot xx
  1. Date: 12/8/2012 9:03:00 AM
    Dang it, how am I gonna bathe my children now??

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    Arnold Avatar Sierra Arnold Date: 12/13/2012 3:13:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    There's always the washing machine!
    Lucas Avatar Becca Lucas Date: 12/8/2012 4:19:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    OH great idea!!! haha These are funny Mandy, thanks for posting!
    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 12/8/2012 9:09:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Try the washing machine Rebecca worked on mine lol xx
  1. Date: 12/8/2012 8:28:00 AM
    Thanks again for another wonderful moment of a laughter by the joke pro Mandy!!! Have a gorgeous day luv. PS: I managed to buy pee pee pants. lol Love always, Gail

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    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 12/8/2012 9:07:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    have a fantastic weekend Gail xx
  1. Date: 12/8/2012 7:53:00 AM
    Love it--a hearty HO HO HO!

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    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 12/8/2012 9:07:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    and back at you Craig xx
  1. Date: 12/8/2012 7:36:00 AM
    :-) thanks for the smiles,Mandy.xox~

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    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 12/8/2012 7:45:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks Arild xx
  1. Date: 12/8/2012 4:32:00 AM
    Couldn't stop.giggling...tnks for the laugh

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    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 12/8/2012 7:45:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    My pleasure , glad you like them but they are not mine I'm afraid xx

My Past Blog Posts

 
Finding You
Date Posted: 5/17/2013 10:43:00 AM
UPDATE FOR DAVID WILLIAMS
Date Posted: 5/9/2013 1:28:00 PM
DAVID WILLIAM'S CON /VOWEL CONTEST Apologies
Date Posted: 5/3/2013 1:17:00 AM
FUNNIES FOR YOU AND NEWS ON SEREN
Date Posted: 4/29/2013 1:13:00 PM
AS YOU SLIDE DOWN THE BANISTER OF LIFE AND BEST WISHES FOR SEREN AND GAIL
Date Posted: 4/26/2013 3:37:00 AM
CAR TROUBLE
Date Posted: 4/20/2013 6:12:00 AM
MAN + WOMAN =
Date Posted: 4/16/2013 8:08:00 AM
ANGRY WIFE
Date Posted: 4/12/2013 8:30:00 AM
Seven Inches
Date Posted: 4/8/2013 6:11:00 AM
WISDON TEETH REMOVAL
Date Posted: 4/5/2013 10:33:00 AM
FINDING THE RIGHT GIRL TO MARRY
Date Posted: 3/30/2013 6:52:00 AM
Best Friends
Date Posted: 3/23/2013 6:55:00 AM
BEER RESEARCH
Date Posted: 3/22/2013 5:39:00 AM
Good Advice
Date Posted: 3/19/2013 3:06:00 AM
Dog Lovers watch this
Date Posted: 3/18/2013 5:31:00 AM
Health Advice
Date Posted: 3/15/2013 4:44:00 AM
Girls Night Out
Date Posted: 3/14/2013 10:35:00 AM
OLD AGE MARRIAGE PROPOSAL
Date Posted: 3/13/2013 6:45:00 AM
Death Of Black Magic
Date Posted: 3/12/2013 4:25:00 AM
CREDIT CARDS
Date Posted: 3/11/2013 3:49:00 AM
A Million Dollars
Date Posted: 3/9/2013 5:20:00 AM
A Kiss A Yard
Date Posted: 3/8/2013 7:26:00 AM
Passing On A Warning
Date Posted: 3/7/2013 11:37:00 AM
Expensive Perfume
Date Posted: 3/6/2013 9:19:00 AM
Wisdom Comes With Age
Date Posted: 3/4/2013 5:54:00 AM

My Poems

12345678
Date PostedPoem TitleFormCategories
5/1/2013BacchusHaikuwine,
5/1/2013A Ripple In TimeLight Poetrylonging,
4/30/2013Re AwakeningSonnetjoy,love,
4/29/2013Our HeartSonnetemotions,
4/25/2013Portrait In WordsSonnetcharacter,
4/22/2013Self PortraitVersecharacter,
4/22/2013UnderstandingRhymemissing you,
4/17/2013The Kitchen FitterFree verse (vers libre)life,me,me,
4/16/2013haiku 3Haikunature,
4/16/2013Love And TrustSonnetlove,words,love,trust,
4/14/2013The First TimeSonnetlove,truth,
4/12/2013UFOSenryulove,
4/11/2013Upon A Bed Of PetalsQuatrainlove,romance,love,
4/10/2013Water BabiesRhymeimagination,children,worl
4/10/2013Famous CouplesRhymelost,god,eve,god,
4/5/2013The Rescue metamorphRhymelove,child,child,friend,h
4/1/2013The MoleLimerickhumorous,
3/29/2013Trial and ErrorRhymemetaphor,strength,
3/27/2013Z is for ZariaABCnature,name,tree,beauty,f
3/27/2013The Rattle Of The KeyboardGrookwrite,
3/23/2013The Missing PieceRhymelife,me,day,me,
3/22/2013What Lurks WithinCoupletangst,light,light,may,me,
3/22/2013Incy Wincy Caterpillar NRCoupletfor kids,
3/22/2013Irrepresible NatureRhymenature,winter,winter,
3/21/2013Who Killed The Easter BunnyRhymehumorous,easter,chocolate
12345678

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