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Cyndi MacMillan's Blog

About Cyndi MacMillan
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Cyndi MacMillan is a well-rounded writer who embraces many genres and forms. Her work has been published in local newspapers and has won contests. She enjoys reading literary journals, and she is actively pursuing publication within their glossy covers.

Verse is both magnetic and kinetic. She attempts - madly- to give equal attention to her poetry, short stories, and a novel-in-progress, the Trim of Wicks.  Regardless of genre, she focuses on language. One word has the power to repel or pull. She never forgets the reader and does her best to make their ride interesting.

Poetry soup is a good forum which enables people from around the world to share poetry. It has some great resources and provides a nice space for friends to meet.

Cyndi lives in a small town in Ontario with her husband, young daughter and far too many books.



Blog Posted:12/17/2012 9:16:00 PM

I am not sleeping well.

Are you?

I have been having nightmares, horrible ones, since the massacre at Sandy Hook .

My daughter is in preschool. Next year she starts junior kindergarten.

After four years of trying to protect her from things like SIDS, choking hazards and home accidents, I am struggling to come to terms that I will never be able to truly keep her safe. As soon as she walks out the door, she is at risk. I know that there was never any guarantee. The very young die of cancer, stroke, common illnesses… this was hard enough to grasp. But gunshots? Homicidal pedophiles?

I’ve spent days crying in private, then smiling for my daughter. Locally, there have been some horrible happenings in the past few years.

I am trying to raise my daughter to be mostly trusting and yet aware of her environment, cautious but always friendly. There are so many GOOD people in the world. Since Friday, I am having a harder time remembering any of this.

The following are five things I think we may all be able to do in the wake of Newtown’s tragedy. . I am writing this because I have been GUTTED by what happened and I can barely sleep…

We can not change what has happened. We can not protect our children. We can not predict who is going to snap and what will turn an ill person into a killing machine.

But WE CAN….

1) Write the government about both gun laws and improved care for the mentally ill
– Send letters. Nothing can happen unless someone is willing to first say, “ENOUGH!” Mental illness has touched my family, changed it forever. Somehow the general public is still under the impression that you can just call the police and have a family member put into an institution. The threat must be imminent and witnessed by THE AUTHORITIES. I once had to call the police on a family member. Guess what? I was the only witness. The person stopped spouting what he’d been spouting and the police couldn’t do a thing! It was hearsay! Even if the person said the devil told him to hurt someone and he actually goes to the local psych ward, the longest they can hold you in Canada is 72 hours. I’ve seen how it works. Family members have their hands TIED! If you want to read something scary, read this, including all the comments on how to avoid being held past the 72 hours. Families have been given the shaft!

2) Refuse to be entertained by bloodshed – Why is it that we are horrified by a teen being hunted in the halls of Colombine and yet some find TV shows, computer games, movies with a theme of violence acceptable and worthy of their time? When we stop watching, they’ll stop making the carnage-flavored lollipops that they are feeding the general public. And if you do spend your money on the crap which heavily features gunplay, well, maybe you should think about the similarities of that fiction and the horrifying reality you witnessed this week… why are you watching what you are watching? Do you feel good about your choices?

3) Choose to NOT NOT NOT buy toy guns for kids – I was a daycare teacher for years. Toy guns disgust me. Why any parent in today’s world would stick a plastic semi-automatic rifle into little Billy’s hands totally baffles me! If you have bought such a toy for a grandson/granddaughter/nephew/niece for Christmas, then I suggest you toss it into the recycling bin where it may make more imaginative and less indicative toys, like blocks, dolls or a dump truck.

4) Be kinder – that man talking to himself on the street? Pass him a smile. The most volatile of our society are powder kegs. Indifference, loathing, disgust—they all light the fuse. The day after the school shooting, I witnessed a thin man begging for coins in front of a grocery store. It was raining. Another man actually went over, kicked his foot and told him, “You’re just lazy, go get a job!” I was dumbfounded. My daughter and I both dropped money into his hat. The wounded eventually bite back! This was not the case in the recent shooting, and I am in no way suggesting that any of the victims had anything to do with what ‘triggered’ the killer. Dear God, they were just babies! Innocents! Let’s learn from them! Be loving, wherever and whenever we can. Is it so impossible to emanate the love of the very young?

5) Be more involved in our community- After the birth of my daughter, a very difficult birth that resulted in seven weeks of homecare and quite a bit of pain, friends and neighbours came to my door with casseroles … it was lovely. I am thinking of the parents and family members right now who have suffered the greatest loss that any human being can suffer. Some have other children. Some are of a sandwich generation, perhaps, and also have elderly parents to care for. I know that their community is rallying around them, doing whatever they can. Let’s look around us… is there something small service we can offer to someone who needs just a little TLC?

I have not led an idyllic life, and I have found that when disaster/tragedy strikes, a game plan for change has helped me in the past. There have been times that.. hmmm?... I've have forced myself to look in the mirror. Even those times when I have not been a problem’s origin, I recognize that my hand has a role in the scheme of things and that when I make better decisions, try to live by a ‘better code’ that my actions stretch further than I thought possible.

I am certain that most of you do all the above already. I have been shown such kindness by so many Soupers, read passionate pleas for peace, for healing, for global change, respect for the santity of life…

I am so grateful for the friendships I have on Soup. These words are not meant to incite. This is just me rambling on because I NEED to say all this or I’ll implode.

A mother's love is fierce, protective by nature... mine is trying not to roar, trying not to suffocate my daughter with love and keep her from feeling able to explore, learn, grow and become independent. DAMMIT IT'S SO HARD!

We’re all hurting, all angry, all feeling somewhat helpless and crushed.

If you have views on how society as a whole could be bettered, share away.

Is there anything you will do differently, try to do differently?

Love and hugs and tears and very real fears,

The world is mourning.

These are Pakistani children in Karachi.

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  1. Date: 12/21/2012 1:25:00 PM
    I cannot watch the hews anymore. I breakdown and cry whenever pictures of those beautiful children come up. The parents are in my prayers. I am sure all who were killed in that senseless shooting and now in heaven. That was a hell of a way to get there.

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  1. Date: 12/20/2012 1:00:00 AM
    Further to my post below,it's like PS, I've been a part since May 2007, no matter where we are from geographically what unites us as a group is our interest in poetry.May all my PS friends have a creative 2013.Rgds Brian

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  1. Date: 12/20/2012 12:55:00 AM
    Race, like skin colour is just skin deep.Culture is what divides.When I became a committed Christian twenty-six years back I discovered in His kingdom there are just children.

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  1. Date: 12/19/2012 3:50:00 PM's about getting people to police other people and the curtailing of free thought and speech; race is nonsense - jewish, american, british, canadian, these are not who we really are, they are just labels we place upon ourselves; how can there be such a thing as race when we are all one?

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    MacMillan Avatar Cyndi MacMillan Date: 12/19/2012 9:07:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Hon, wasn't calling YOU anit-semitic!!! I was referring to the article that you alluded to! The first response on the article (go look) is "Of course its the jews"???!!! I am not certain where he is pulling his views from, other than because children were killed it was done by Israel? Huh???
    MacMillan Avatar Cyndi MacMillan Date: 12/19/2012 9:07:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    And race is very real for many. I think Nelson Mandela would say that race is real and often ugly. Do think the world of you. You know that, right?
    MacMillan Avatar Cyndi MacMillan Date: 12/19/2012 9:07:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    And race is very real for many. I think Nelson Mandela would say that race is real and often ugly. Do think the world of you. You know that, right?
  1. Date: 12/19/2012 3:47:00 PM
    cyndi, I'm not bothered what people think of me; some like me, some don't, but I just continue being me and wherever the truth and the evidence takes me is where I will go every time...I knew, even before I posted my comment, that the anti-semitic card would be played - such is the mental conditioning and programming of humanity - but no way is the fear of being branded 'racist' going to stop me from exposing what needs to be exposed...divisions of race are there to divide and rule us and 'racism' is a tool that's used to keep us trapped in the five-sense prison, believing that we are our bodies or the country we happen to have been born in...

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  1. Date: 12/19/2012 5:31:00 AM
    "israeli death squads involved in sandy hook bloodbath" says intelligence analyst mike harris; after harris' broadcast, key members of the military and law enforcement community contacted veterans today in full support of harris' analysis, one is quoted as saying "harris hit the nail right on the head and it is about time someone spoke up."...I hope the truth eventually comes out as opposed to the 'lone psychotic gunman' media fairy story; people need to ask themselves where they are getting their information and 'facts' from - their own careful research or the illuminati-owned mainstream media?

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    MacMillan Avatar Cyndi MacMillan Date: 12/19/2012 7:31:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry
    MacMillan Avatar Cyndi MacMillan Date: 12/19/2012 7:27:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry let us be wary of anti-Semitism and media pulled from Iranian sources who are aiming to cause further distrust in the English world by spreading lies... Charlotte, you KNOW I think the world of you, but I do not share these views, hon...
  1. Date: 12/18/2012 3:43:00 PM
    Cyndi, you can't live in fear, that's all I can offer here. It's like they tell people who are afraid to fly. well, just being on the freeway driving a car is far riskier than flying in a plane. Same goes for being involved in a mass shooting incident. If one is living close to God, He will protect you or you can at least know that in death you will find your reward.

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  1. Date: 12/18/2012 9:16:00 AM
    Sadly Cyndi we cannot change of ourselves.Only by turning back to God can we change ,empowered so to do by the Holy Spirit.Trust me ,I speak from experience thereof.Christmas Greetings to all my poetic friends here on PS.Rgds Brian

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  1. Date: 12/18/2012 12:13:00 AM
    WE have collectively made the world an unsafe place for our children. They look up to us to keep them from harm. I know the feeling of helplessness: Watch children daily throwing their lives away on drugs and other activities. See the dispair in their faces - eyes blank. Governments are playing war games and getting rich at the tables of "negotiation".... We can only pray that our homes are not violated and that we can raise children who can carry the torch of a collective spirit of love for humanity into their adult life. I do not think that we will see changes in our lifetime - not while there is money to be made out of war.

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  1. Date: 12/17/2012 10:50:00 PM
    This is a beautiful, warm, and sincere write. There is not too much one can do. We cannot live in isolation from what goes on in this word of ours. Thanks for this great blog. Jancarl

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  1. Date: 12/17/2012 9:28:00 PM
    It is hard Cyndi luv but until the powers that be change things all you can do is protect your daughter and teach her the ways of the world with a loving hand.. As people do today they close themselves around their families to protect them unfortunately this does result in pushing away others and to be honest you can't blame them, when a tragedy like this strikes and so many innocent children are needlessly taken it only reinforces that people are doing the right thing protecting their own.. Even 12000 miles away im holding my two closer and their 12 & 19.. because as a Mum its your first instinct..

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My Past Blog Posts

Date Posted: 10/16/2014 5:28:00 AM
Date Posted: 10/6/2014 11:58:00 AM
Date Posted: 10/2/2014 9:39:00 PM
Date Posted: 9/30/2014 5:37:00 PM
How I judge Contests by Cyndi MacMillan
Date Posted: 9/10/2014 9:58:00 PM
Date Posted: 9/8/2014 8:54:00 PM
Date Posted: 9/8/2014 10:25:00 AM
Date Posted: 9/6/2014 6:23:00 PM
Date Posted: 9/4/2014 9:39:00 PM
Grammar and poetry: a Fiction Writer’s Oddball View
Date Posted: 9/2/2014 10:52:00 AM
Date Posted: 8/22/2014 10:47:00 AM
Date Posted: 8/20/2014 9:28:00 AM
Date Posted: 7/15/2014 9:57:00 PM
Date Posted: 7/13/2014 5:19:00 AM
Date Posted: 7/11/2014 9:53:00 PM
Date Posted: 6/11/2014 6:17:00 PM
Date Posted: 6/7/2014 6:56:00 AM
Date Posted: 6/4/2014 10:19:00 PM
Date Posted: 5/27/2014 3:20:00 PM
Date Posted: 5/8/2014 10:21:00 PM
Date Posted: 5/6/2014 9:04:00 AM
Date Posted: 5/5/2014 9:13:00 AM
Date Posted: 5/4/2014 12:50:00 PM
Date Posted: 4/4/2014 9:32:00 PM
Date Posted: 4/4/2014 4:26:00 PM

My Recent Poems

Date PostedPoem TitleFormCategories
10/15/2014DARK ANGELS OF HIGHGATESestinafuneral,psychological,sad
9/4/2014I COMESFree versesexy,
9/2/2014cummings and iVersepoetry,word play,
8/25/2014LIFE WILL BE A HONEYMOONLyricparadise,passion,romantic
8/25/2014HOSTEL, QUEBEC CITY, 1978Free versehistory,places,
6/9/2014THE RETURNSonnetdepression,giving,life,lo
4/21/2014LA MARQUISEFree versepsychological,
4/8/2014BUKOWSKI CONTESTFree versemoving on,power,teenage,
4/4/2014GINGHAM AND LACE, A BLITZ POEMVersedaughter,love,
4/4/2014NUDE, THIRTY DOLLARS, A BLITZVerseart,imagination,lost love
3/24/201450 GODSFree versegod,peace,philosophy,
3/15/2014WINTER IN PORTLANDFree versedepression,winter,
3/11/2014FREEDOM BLUESTail-rhymefreedom,
2/28/2014WELCOME TO THE BLUENOSEAcrosticfish,history,journey,sea,
2/25/2014PITY THE PIRANHAFree verseintrospection,people,
2/13/2014DOUBLE OH, A BOND CROWN, EXAMPLE FOR CONTESTCrown of Sonnetsfilm,sexy,
2/11/2014ORION: A PERSPECTIVE for third to tenthSonnetmythology,star,
2/10/2014TARTANS, A SONNET FOR FRANCINESonnetfriend,patriotic,places,p
2/9/2014TESTIMONIALS, A SONNET FOR BRIANSonnetfaith,friend,nature,
2/5/2014ON THE FRINGE, A SONNET FOR MARLONSonnetafrica,allegory,culture,f
2/3/2014SUMMERLAND, A SONNET FOR CARRIE RICHARDSSonnetfriend,music,places,poetr
2/2/2014WORD ON THE STREET, 2009, A SONNET FOR DAVIDSonnetbooks,friend,places,poetr
1/31/2014HEROES, A SONNET FOR CRAIGSonnetfriend,hero,places,poetry
1/29/2014DIVINE STEEPLES, A SONNET FOR CATIESonnetfriend,love,places,poetry
1/28/2014SNIPPETS, A SONNET FOR ANDREASonnetfilm,friend,poetry,
1/28/2014HEY WAITER, THERE'S A TURTLE IN MY SOUP, sonnet by SYNISTER TRENDENCIESSonnetconflict,metaphor,poets,
1/27/2014NEW-DALI, A SONNET FOR CHANSonnetart,friend,poetry,time,
1/26/2014MUSE, A SONNET FOR KATHRYNSonnetfriend,love,places,poetry
1/24/2014ONE TWO ONE, A SONNET FOR DEBBIESonnetfriend,love,places,poetry
1/23/2014FIREWORKS, A SONNET FOR LINDA MARIESonnetfriend,heaven,life,metaph
1/22/2014UNREHEARSED, A SONNET FOR NETTESonnetart,friend,love,
1/21/2014THE WIT OF ROSE, A SONNET FOR MYSTIC ROSESonnetfantasy,friend,places,
1/20/2014CHANTRY, A SONNET FOR GAILSonnetlight,memory,places,
1/17/2014HAT MAN, A SONNET FOR RUBENSonnetfriendship,poetry,
1/14/2014FANFARE, A POEM FOR CALEBSonnetbooks,friend,imagination,
1/14/2014MY HEART BELONGS TO MONTREAL: A CONSTANZAIambic Pentameterheart,places,
1/13/2014AN EDUCATED MANFree verseeducation,life,truth,wisd
1/7/2014UNTITLEDFree versesummer,time,
1/6/2014THE STANDProsetruth,
1/4/2014WOMAN, I BEI do not know?life,
12/19/2013EXPLORING THE BASEMENTFree verseabuse,childhood,courage,
12/12/2013LET ME INFLAME: A POET'S PRAYERVersepassion,poetry,
12/11/2013PARDON ME, DID YOU JUST BAN CHRIS AECHTNER FROM SOUPProsefeelings,freedom,friend,
12/10/2013UNHOLY Versewinter,
12/3/2013LA VIE EN ROSELight Poetrycharacter,imagination,
12/2/2013OPENING A POET'S VEIN, WORDS,Versewriting,
12/1/2013MOTHER'S NIGHTRondeaumother,mythology,
11/29/2013RIPPLESFree versesad,writing,
11/8/2013A LETTER TO MY DAUGHTER - HARD CONVERSATIONSProsedaughter,introspection,
9/28/2013EMILY DICKINSONSonnetpoetess,
9/27/2013HEY WAITER, THERE'S A HITLER IN MY SOUPFree verseparody,poetry,
9/26/2013THE VIRGIN AND CHILDSonnetfaith,jesus,mother,
9/21/2013YOU, JUST FOUR, KISSEDFree versejudgement,
9/12/2013LAST WISHESFree versedeath,niece,sad,
8/24/2013Sijo 1Sijoimage,innocence,
8/6/2013THE OTHER-WISEFree verseart,introspection,
7/24/2013PIMPEDFree versechildren,lust,society,
7/17/2013MARGINSFree versedaughter,summer,
7/15/2013SPINNING WHEELFree versechange,home,moving on,
6/5/2013COME, ARIONSonnetfantasy,horse,mythology,
6/5/2013BAIT, 1986Free versegrowing up,lust,men,
6/3/2013COME AND PLAY MELyricmuse,music,passion,romant
5/31/2013haiku 6Haikuchildren,summer,
5/29/2013TURNING WENDIGOFree versemurder,mystery,
5/28/2013HER FIRST PLACESonnetart,imagination,
5/27/2013THE SHININGSestinaevil,film,horror,
5/22/2013ALL FALL DOWNSestinadeath,history,london,
5/18/2013POETRYFree versepoetry,
5/13/2013MADE IN BANGLADESHGhazalchange,clothes,death,
5/10/2013Contemporary haikuHaikuchildren,family,mother,sw
5/7/2013LOVE CLAMORSVillanellecare,people,rights,
5/6/2013haiku for CatieHaikugames,sexy,
5/5/2013SUNDAY SOJOURNHaibungarden,morning,time,
5/3/2013haiku - For MomsHaikulife,may,mother,
5/3/2013haiku 7 - verblessHaikuseasons,
5/2/2013FLOWER FAERIESQuintain (English)fairy,flower,
4/28/2013WOMENFree versefriendship,gender,
4/26/2013SYLVIACrown of Sonnetslife,poets,writing,
4/20/2013THE POET'S CREEDFree versepoetry,world,writing,
4/18/2013TYPEWRITERFree verselust,writing,
4/17/2013ITFree versepoetry,writing,
4/11/2013GET ME TO THE PUBLyricfunny,life,places,song,me
4/10/2013TWELVE DOLLARS, UNLESS PRICED DIFFERENTLYFree versenostalgia,women,
4/9/2013haiku 2013Haikuflower,food,
4/8/2013THE ADJECTIVE IMPERATIVECoupleton writing and words,word
4/1/2013MY JANESonnetromantic,
3/31/2013haiku for CharlesHaikunature,people,time,
3/28/2013THE THORNY CROWNRondeaueaster,faith,

My Photos

Fav Poems

Poem TitleFormCategories
The Sowing Free versedevotion,
Ten Little ToesRhymedaughter,lifeold,old,,gra
Woodland RhapsodyQuatraininspirational
Contradicting KeatsSonnetintrospection,life
Surrender to LoveRhymeloveme,
A Totum Pole OdeConcretenative american,people,
MORE DREAMS TO ROWRhyme royalinspirational,life,
When the Tab Comes DueFree verseinspirational,introspecti
Lighting My Candle From WithinQuintain (English)caregiving,introspection,
The Kirk by the SeaCoupletnostalgia,religion,love,
Moonlight On The WardChokahealth,life,
Nocturnal PoetryRhymeimagination,life,poetry,
FROSTY NIGHT STROLLCoupletinspirational,seasons,
Our ThanksgivingLight Poetryholiday,
Tomorrow's GraceEthereepeace,
A New Star Shines Above HawaiiRhymededication,music,
Jesus, Our SaviorShapereligion,life,
Monarch of SummerHaibunanimals,devotion,inspirat
Midnight PearlsThan-Baukintrospection,love,
Beaucoup BloomsTerza Rimanature,spring,spring,
On Heaven's DoorwayNarrativeinspirational,life,care,c
WALKING ON FAITHVersefaith,for children,
BeachworldFree verseplaces,sea,sun,
Sleepless NightsNarrativeangst,imagination,mystery
Another FaceRhymelost love,
What Dreams are Made Of - LGTBlank versefear,life,mystery,
Paired ParingsBalladchildhood,
AUTUMN'S SPLENDOROUS BEAUTYQuatrainnature,autumn,autumn,
AnticipationFree verseautumn,death,life,
friend to friendHaikupeople,philosophy,
CalligraphyVerseon writing and words,
Night ComesRhymetime,
Without Hope's GleamTerzanellehope,flower,flower,joy,pa
When Your Dead YOUR DeadRhymefriendship,love,wife,
after my prayerHaikuinspirational,
Chamber Music ChoppedBlank versemusic,
Money-GodFree versededication,hope,love,reco
Down FallItalian Sonnetbeautiful,miracle,nature,
God ForbidCoupletangst,devotion,write,life
To Kashinath and CyndiRhymededication,devotion,frien
EdinburghFree versededication,
Shield WallsLyricimagination,love,
Live The ClichesFree versedream,hope,love,poetry,
Bliss StateQuatrainfaith,
A Reminder: To BeFree versetruth,writing,
She Came In and Changed EverythingDramatic Verse (Verse Drama)death,deep,epic,evil,sorr
IN THE MOODLight Poetryadventure,woman,
EdinburghFree versededication,hope,life,love
The BywayRhymecare,
To Love MyselfSonnetlove,new year,self,
Westward MovementFree versedevotion,love,peace,
The Rocking ChairRhymechild,christmas,sister,
To the Rescue Rhymesnow,
A Perfect StormRhyme royallife,
Onward Christian SoldiersRhyme 
BEYOND TEARSRhymechild,encouraging,hope,
Dewberry CobblerHaibungrowing up,
The Miracle MotherFree versemiracle,mother,
ReleaseFree verseencouraging,grief,hope,st
A Girls Night OutRhymehumorous,
IN STILLNESSFree versechange,life,

Fav Poets

Debbie Guzzi United States Flag United States Read
Caryl Muzzey United States Flag United States Read
Andrea Dietrich United States Flag United States Read
Joe Flach United States Flag United States Read
nette onclaud Philippines Flag Philippines Read
Drake Eszes United States Flag United States Read
Mystic Rose Canada Flag Canada Read
mourning mist France Flag France Read
elizabeth wesley Canada Flag Canada Read
Rhonda Johnson-Saunders United States Flag United States Read
Ruben O. Argentina Flag Argentina Read
Carrie Richards United States Flag United States Read
kathryn collins United States Flag United States Read
Catie Lindsey United States Flag United States Read
craig cornish United States Flag United States Read
David Williams United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Charmaine Chircop Malta Flag Malta Read
Francine Roberts Canada Flag Canada Read
Eileen Manassian Lebanon Flag Lebanon Read
Poet Destroyer A United States Flag United States Read
Faye Gibson United States Flag United States Read