Submit Your Poems
Get Your Premium Membership


See and share Beautiful Nature Photos and amazing photos of interesting places




Chris D. Aechtner's Blog

About Chris D. Aechtner
(Show Details...)
Bloggers PhotoDreamt a dream
about falling asleep,
woke up in yet another one --
a near-seamless string of dreams within dreams.

As I become older, 
I still retain the eternal heart of a 6 year old child.
Sort of like Peter Pan....

....and I will always take my chances with Captain Hook.
____


I am a Canadian who grew-up on the West Coast.
I have some of this, do a little of that(lol).
Aside from writing, I enjoy oil painting as a creative outlet.
I also love mountain biking.
I am a gardener and bio-chemist.
(So many "I"s)

As far as the Peter Conspiracy goes,
Chris is a shortened version of my birth-name.
It is my legal name.
I am not some guy from NYC; I have never lived there.

PoetrySoup.com is the first site where I ever publicly posted a poem online.



Random Thoughts (re-post)


Blog Posted:9/26/2012 3:15:00 PM
Someone on the Soup asked if Harry Horsman is my Father.
I found this to be quite an intriguing question,
especially considering our surnames(re-marriage, etc, could
make such things possible, I suppose).
Harry isn't my Father, but if he was, I am sure that he would
be a good Dad.


On the topic of Fathers, I was wondering how many people on
the Soup know about all of my Dads? You see, I have four Fathers;
two of them are biological.
Now, most people don't believe that two separate sperm belonging
to two different donors, could fertilize the same egg.
I say bullocks to the non-believers, as I am living proof~!!
I never understood why this was such a hard thing to believe,
especially when considering some of the other facts about my life.
Such as the fact that even though I was born in 1973,
I was arrested under the guise of McCarthyism in Ohio,
during the spring of 1953.
Now
THAT is much harder to believe than the possibility of two sperm
from separate donors successfully fertilizing the same embryo, right?
Right?
Yet, I was arrested as a Red in 1953, and imprisoned for 4 years,
a full 20 years before I was born.
Add to the confusion, the fact that I was also born in 1975.
I have led a crazy life so far.
At the moment, I am raising a pack of Triceratops....
....needless to say, it is an expensive and time-consuming venture.


Alright, so now back to my two biological Dads.
Dad number one is, Mick Jagger, and Dad number two is, John Lennon.
The most amazing thing about this, is how much both Dads detested
each other(not so much publicly, though),
yet they ended up in the same bed....
....well, you know wot I am talking about.
I call(ed) them: Mick-Dad and John-Dad.
I got my cheekbones, nose and hair from John-Dad;
my lips and libido from Mick-Dad.
Most people feel sorry for me that my Fathers are Jagger and Lennon -
you know, the whole bad example analogy surrounding Mick-Dad,
and because John-Dad was murdered by Mark D. Chapman(may he die a
violent death!).

Ok, Mick-Dad almost ruined my life, I can admit this;
but I still love him as a Dad.
No questions asked.
The problem wasn't so much Mick-Dad, as it was, Uncle Keith.
Keith Richards isn't really my Uncle; I just called him Uncle Keith.
One of my Mick-Dad's worst judgement calls, was to have Uncle Keith
babysit me a lot. Uncle Keith partied, but contrary to belief,
he spent a lot of time getting drunk and high in a more private setting,
inbetween tours, albums, and drug-induced orgies.
By the time I was four, Uncle Keith had me drinking booze
like a fish drinks water.
By the age of six, I was smoking cigarettes and experimenting with narcotics.
I vividly remember being six years old in the summer of 1978(remember,
since I was also born in 1975, I was simultaneously 6 and 4 years-old~!!).
Mick-Dad had a year-long lease on a penthouse apartment in
downtown Barcelona, Spain.
Uncle Keith was babysitting me, because Mick-Dad was visiting one
of his many mistresses.
He turned to me and said:


"Heahernnnnnn 'aveah chumun ovah shishiloumbah."

99% of wot Uncle Keith said was indecipherable by me.
I simply took a wild stab, guessed at wot he meant.
He held out his hand, showcasing a blue pill in his palm.
Because I was six, I figured he was offering me one of those
Flintstones multivitamins.
Uncle Keith poured me a triple Scotch, no water,
to help wash down wot I believed at the time to be a multivitamin.
20 minutes later, I was so high,
that I had cranked up the stereo and was dancing.
Dancing hard.
I believed that my dancing was generating the electricity
needed to run the building, and how if I stopped dancing,
there wouldn't be any electricity to power the stereo....
....or anything else, for that matter.
The sun was going down,
and the prospect of hanging out with Uncle Keith in the dark,
filled me with nightmarish trepidation.
He was scary enough with the lights on.
For me to keep the lights going,
I had to keep generating electricity by dancing.
Uncle Keith was clapping along, rolling around on the couch,
laughing himself silly.
He kept shouting:


"Hupargh ah lil' butah loudah boooooiiiii!"

I believe he had been telling me to crank the music louder
because he couldn't hear it?
Regardless, he seemed to be having a blast watching me dance,
while he snorted massive piles of cocaine from off the coffee table.
This was just the tip of the iceberg.
6 months later, I was snorting cocaine with Uncle Keith.
The lines were fatter than two finger widths.
Then, just as I was becoming addicted to shooting smack with Uncle Keith,
John-Dad came to my rescue.


John Lennon was nothing like the media and fans/haters believed him to be.
Yes, he didn't help raise my half-brother, until Julian had turned 4 years old.
Yes, he didn't intervene with me, until I was 6 years old.
Yes, he had done copious amounts of drugs, and had been a
violent prick during his 20s -- but that was in his past.
He was a resilient man.
He wasn't the space cadet that people made him out to be.
By the time he saved me from the clutches of Uncle Keith
and my sex-addicted Mick-Dad, John-Dad had turned over a new leaf.
He wanted to be a good Father, even if it meant hardly recording any
new music.
And wot a wonderful Father he was. Sincerely.
After sending me to a great rehabilitation centre in Maryland,
John-Dad was nothing short of a loving, nurturing and aware Father.
He was a full-time, stay-at-home parent by this point.
He did all of the grocery shopping, laundry, cleaning, cooked our meals,
and even home-schooled Julian and I.
Unfortunately, this was less than 2 years before he was murdered by Chapman.
Even though our time together was short, he impacted my life for the positive.
I remember how he would wear disguises because he wanted to be able to
traverse the city without guards, chauffers and the whole deal.
We would walk, bicycle, take public transit and cabs all over New York City,
bringing along our sketchbooks. We would simply observe everyday life
together, jotting down quick sketches as we went.
After returning home, we would cut out the newest sketches using
exacto-blades, fix them up, finish them off with water colours.
If it wasn't raining, we would do this exercise out on the balcony,
where we grew all sorts of vegetables together.
In a way, I am thankful that I wasn't in New York on the fateful night
my John-Dad was shot in the back with 4 hollow-points from a .38 Special
revolver(Mark D. Chapman, may you die a violent death~!!).
I had been in the Kremlin on a 3 week visit with one of my other Fathers,
Mikhael Gorbechev.


It wasn't until 2 years later, when the reality of the incident truly set in,
and I broke down into a deep spell of depression.
Uncle Paul had Julian and I live with him for about a year.
He really helped us get through this dark period in our lives.
I have fond memories of performing "Blackbird" with Uncle Paul and Julian.

All in all, I feel lucky to have had so many interesting Dads.
Not sure why people feel sorry for me.
Especially when considering the $100 million in my Swiss bank account.

I have nearly fully recovered from the influences of Uncle Keith....

Wot can I say? I was born to Rock & Roll.





Please Login
 
  1. Date: 9/27/2012 11:07:00 PM
    I'm not born yet. I am a trace of DNA and cabbage mulch... funny blog. So much for sleep. Ugh...1am?

    Login to Reply
  1. Date: 9/26/2012 8:57:00 PM
    I'm going too fast tonight to read this all. But it is some really fun blarney that I was reading in the first half of it! So who is the little dude in the bottom picture?

    Login to Reply
    Dietrich Avatar Andrea Dietrich Date: 9/26/2012 10:53:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    oh, thought maybe it was his son, Chris. hahaha
    O. Avatar Ruben O. Date: 9/26/2012 9:01:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    It's Lennon! : )
  1. Date: 9/26/2012 7:43:00 PM
    Im glad you've re-post this story because I have not read it before. There is just one thing hard to believe: Barcelona is not in Spain! : ) Those psilocybin shrooms are so goooood!

    Login to Reply
    ML Avatar SCRIBE ML Date: 9/26/2012 9:50:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Hurry up and run out Ruben. That piece is huge, with so few words!
    O. Avatar Ruben O. Date: 9/26/2012 8:32:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    These shrooms are anti-depressant....when im out of them: I write "time" poems! : )
    Aechtner Avatar Chris D. Aechtner Date: 9/26/2012 8:27:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Ruben, wot Barcelona are you talking about haha!
    Aechtner Avatar Chris D. Aechtner Date: 9/26/2012 8:22:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Ruben, you noticed! There are a few other discrepancies as well lol....
    ML Avatar SCRIBE ML Date: 9/26/2012 8:20:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Now I know how you came up with the "Time" poem. :)
    ML Avatar SCRIBE ML Date: 9/26/2012 8:18:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Chris is sharing?
  1. Date: 9/26/2012 7:16:00 PM
    What you are about to read is the truth, maybe not the whole truth, but true nevertheless. I was born in 1900 (according to the US government - both SS and IRS) My grandmother was born in 1902. I am older than my own grandmother. My mother was born in 1925 (not really important, but i love her) I was born in 1951 according to my mother. I married my husband in 1973. Again, the US government claims it was 1975. Now who would get married at age 75 to a youngster only 22. I do not have a birth certificate because I was born in a military hospital, now defunct. SS will not accept the card I do have, but neither can prove I was born in 1900 - so, the question is - was I born?

    Login to Reply
    Grisetti Avatar Joann Grisetti Date: 9/26/2012 10:04:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    This is actual fact, it is just hard to believe. The US government insists that my birth date is 1900. I have been arguing with them since 1995.
    Aechtner Avatar Chris D. Aechtner Date: 9/26/2012 8:25:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Joann, that is a very neat story!
    ML Avatar SCRIBE ML Date: 9/26/2012 8:19:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    You 2 must be siblings!
    O. Avatar Ruben O. Date: 9/26/2012 7:34:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    : )
  1. Date: 9/26/2012 6:05:00 PM
    Chris, I so feel like I have to do an emotional tip toe here, but I must tell you, (see, you thought it was going to be about you-----not!) If a party is ever hosted where all soupers can come Francine RULES---cause she is one fun gal!!!! BTW mind games rule and you rule with mind games----awesome dude!!!!!

    Login to Reply
    ML Avatar SCRIBE ML Date: 9/26/2012 7:10:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Lol
    ML Avatar SCRIBE ML Date: 9/26/2012 7:09:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Aechtner Avatar Chris D. Aechtner Date: 9/26/2012 7:06:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Craig, even though it would be an honour to have such a title(not), I think you deserve the honour :D
    Roberts Avatar Francine Roberts Date: 9/26/2012 6:17:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    shhhh, Craig !! you weren't supposed to tell
  1. Date: 9/26/2012 3:51:00 PM
    Lol about the Harr y thing. I'm aware of you popping mushrooms with, you know who; now you have me thinking, what they were stuffed with!

    Login to Reply
    Aechtner Avatar Chris D. Aechtner Date: 9/26/2012 8:23:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Moses....
    ML Avatar SCRIBE ML Date: 9/26/2012 7:13:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Why are you so surprised? The Moses thing?
    Aechtner Avatar Chris D. Aechtner Date: 9/26/2012 5:48:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Dr. Linton Bradley, I am a bit surprised that you remembered the mushroom incident. Aside from verifying Francine's question(yes)....wot happens in Rome, stays in Rome?
    Roberts Avatar Francine Roberts Date: 9/26/2012 3:55:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    B.C.'s finest produce perhaps ?
  1. Date: 9/26/2012 3:43:00 PM
    well we have one thing in common Rock & Roll, so maybe there is a connection Son. my recent dna test in the good U.S of A tells me i'm a viking, and with all the red heads in my family i'm not surprised::: anyhow not seen this blog before, and i'm disappointed, at what francine below reveals.. i thought it was all true, bugger me got it wrong again!!!!!!!!!

    Login to Reply
    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 9/27/2012 7:22:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    could be my mum was a stunner lolxx
    horsman Avatar harry horsman Date: 9/27/2012 7:06:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    chance would be a fine thing Mandy, although sixpence today would be worth a few Quid...
    Tams The Golden Girl Avatar Mandy Tams The Golden Girl Date: 9/27/2012 6:57:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Are you my dad too harry, there is red hair in my family, my grandfather was given a sixpence once by a man that said he would give a six pence to anyone with redder hair than him. xx
    Aechtner Avatar Chris D. Aechtner Date: 9/26/2012 5:46:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Harry-Dad! How goes it, Pa? I knew you were a viking!
    Roberts Avatar Francine Roberts Date: 9/26/2012 3:54:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    now now Harry, I said I would believe it to be total fabrication if it were anyone BUT our Chris... of course I believe him
  1. Date: 9/26/2012 3:21:00 PM
    I have read this before, love it and would find it total fabrication Chris if it was anyone but you... have an awesome day

    Login to Reply
    Aechtner Avatar Chris D. Aechtner Date: 9/26/2012 5:45:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Heya, Francine -- thanks for giving me the benefit of the doubt(lol), and being a good sport! I hope you have an awesome day as well.

My Past Blog Posts

 
Shoddy Grammar
Date Posted: 8/31/2014 5:58:00 PM
For many people here, this is a long, boring blog: The Cetacean Brain and Hominid Perceptions of Cetacean Intelligence
Date Posted: 8/28/2014 6:10:00 PM
Corn dogs **edited**
Date Posted: 8/22/2014 6:17:00 PM
The Soupiquette of Return Comments **edited**
Date Posted: 8/20/2014 9:01:00 PM
Random Thoughts #1027: We
Date Posted: 8/15/2014 4:47:00 PM
Some wildlife photos of mine
Date Posted: 8/13/2014 2:36:00 PM
Perhaps They Could Be Re-located To The Moon?
Date Posted: 8/5/2014 8:16:00 PM
Some Thoughts Concerning The Islamic/Zionist Situation
Date Posted: 7/28/2014 3:50:00 PM
Who do you think will win?
Date Posted: 7/10/2014 3:23:00 PM
My Turtle-God
Date Posted: 7/2/2014 5:30:00 PM
2014 FIFA Football Fever
Date Posted: 6/26/2014 2:23:00 PM
Media News is bad for you – and giving up watching/reading it, will make you more happy and healthy
Date Posted: 5/7/2014 10:44:00 AM
After reading this blog, you will never again have to claim that you don't know how to write haiku :P
Date Posted: 4/23/2014 3:04:00 PM
For many of you, this is just another boring blog concerning thoughts about haiku(any Japanese short-forms)
Date Posted: 4/1/2014 7:24:00 PM
tanka (a long blog for a short form) **edits / updates**
Date Posted: 3/20/2014 11:46:00 PM
Random Thoughts #126: 7 Gold Stars
Date Posted: 3/11/2014 10:45:00 PM
My 2014 Contest Disclaimer
Date Posted: 3/11/2014 12:23:00 AM
Hullo, Soupers! Wot! Wot!
Date Posted: 3/8/2014 12:27:00 AM
Questions Concerning Soup-Etiquette -- Part II
Date Posted: 11/20/2012 11:52:00 AM
Questions Concerning Soup-Etiquette......Maybe?
Date Posted: 11/19/2012 9:52:00 PM
Random Thoughts: Damien Star-Man, the Israeli crack-smoker
Date Posted: 11/17/2012 11:00:00 PM
The BEAST 666
Date Posted: 11/13/2012 11:22:00 AM
Frankenstorm 2012: A Haunting of Shelleys
Date Posted: 10/31/2012 12:35:00 PM
Noah Exposed: How The Western Lands Came To Be (Part I)
Date Posted: 10/2/2012 2:38:00 PM
Lazy Boy: A Mythology
Date Posted: 10/1/2012 1:12:00 PM

My Poems

12345678
Date PostedPoem TitleFormCategories
8/19/2014Footles - Skinny dipping in late September: Cause and EffectFootlehumor,september,
8/7/2014MesopotamiaKimogrowth,high school,hope,k
7/30/2014The LobotomizerFree versehistory,hope,
4/14/2014flowers for Chinaski -- part iiFree verseflower,growth,hope,tribut
4/12/2014flowers for ChinaskiFree verseflower,tribute,
4/5/2014 -- and there are proverbsFree verseallegory,philosophy,
3/24/2014Preacher's SonFree versefaith,hope,life,mystery,
3/18/2014EvergreenFree versehope,love,lyric,tribute,
3/2/2014Captain CrunchFree versecrazy,
2/19/2014Stalking The Stalker: Peter Pan CanFree versedark,
2/4/2014When Harry Heironymous Huffenhoffer Met Henrietta HuckhellopolisAlliterationgrowth,
1/14/2014Tristesses de la lune by Charles Pierre Baudelaire -- with English translationsFree verse 
1/6/2014Making Love with Crystal AntennasFree versehope,mystery,
12/19/2013Sunlight and Rain: The Prism of an AnarchistFree versehope,
12/10/2013EdinburghFree versededication,hope,life,love
12/8/2013MFree versecelebration,hope,life,lov
11/7/2013The Kreepy KidsFree versehalloween,happiness,
9/18/2013A Reminder: To BeFree versetruth,writing,
8/1/2013Live The ClichesFree versedream,hope,love,poetry,
7/22/2013The Soup ReichFree versesatire,slam,
7/18/2013What is thisRhymesilly,writing,
7/8/201323 warning signs that you are severely addicted to poetrysoup dot comList satire,silly,
7/3/2013The Gospel of Lucifer - Chapter 11: 1 - 8Prose Poetrymystery,
5/20/2013Kiss The SkyFree versededication,love,lyric,tha
5/2/2013EdinburghFree versededication,
12345678

My Photos


ps_018.JPG

Fav Poems

123
Poem TitleFormCategories
Ripping ChristVerseallegory,history,social,t
PulpRhymeallegory,death,history,li
A Deeper DivideVersepassion,people,philosophy
The Devil's TideNarrativeadventure,angel,june,life
PsychedelicVerselife,love,mystery,nostalg
Recording/Re-playing/Recording/Re-playingFree verselife,people,philosophy,ti
The Skipping of StonesChokanature,sea
MUSEUM OF MODERN ARTFree verseinspirational,uplifting
This Night Sonnet 
Day of ReckoningChokanature
Go Ask AliceQuatrainallegory,devotion,fantasy
the farm boy Tankachildhood,nature
A. Long Learned Tale.I do not know?epic,space,
SocialitesFree verselifenight,night,
Priorities Viewed by a Dying ManVillanelledeath,introspectionnature
Answered Prayer Sijolife,nature
Haiku for Hidden HabitatsHaikunature
RaindropsI do not know?adventure,angst,art,imagi
Pretentious Collaboration Written During Conversation (Credit to Emmily Rosa) Free versepeople,love,may,time,
I Remember When I Could FlyLyricsong-lyricme,me,
Anxious DissolutionFree verseallegory,depression,intro
Is this a Grook or Not? (Nothing)Grookconfusion
Let me write you something. Free verseloveme,write,epic,me,writ
Under the Same Moon -3-Way-Collaboration-Coupletfriendship,lifeworld,life
BreakingFree verselost love,
123

Fav Poets

PoetCountry 
christopher higgins Jamaica Flag Jamaica Read
daver austin United States Flag United States Read
Carolyn Devonshire United States Flag United States Read
Debbie Guzzi United States Flag United States Read
Izzy Gumbo United States Flag United States Read
Ruben O. Argentina Flag Argentina Read
Charmaine Chircop Malta Flag Malta Read
James Marshall Goff United States Flag United States Read
James Fraser United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
binibining p.iNk Philippines Flag Philippines Read
Linda-Marie SweetHeart Italy Flag Italy Read
Andrea Dietrich United States Flag United States Read
John Trusty United States Flag United States Read
Juan Paolo Galua Philippines Flag Philippines Read
harry horsman United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Wilma Neels South Africa Flag South Africa Read
Tony Bush United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Kristen Varwig United States Flag United States Read
Thvia Stein United States Flag United States Read
Gwendolen Rix United States Flag United States Read
Christine Ueri South Africa Flag South Africa Read
Elaine George Canada Flag Canada Read
iolanda Scripca United States Flag United States Read
Monterey Sirak United States Flag United States Read