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Deborah Guzzi travels for inspiration: China, Nepal [during the civil war], Japan, Egypt [two weeks before ‘The Arab Spring’], and most recently Peru. First published at the age of sixteen, she writes articles for Massage and Aroma Therapy Magazines. Her poetry has been accepted in the Literary Journals of Western CT. University, Inclement Magazine, Pyrokinections, Jellyfish Whispers, Grey Wolf’s Summer Legends Anthology, The Germ, Wilderness Literary Review, The Anthology Sweet Dreams & Night Terrors, Bitterzoet Magazine, haiku journal, Contemporary Haibun Online, Bella on line, The Autumn Sound, Eskimo Pie, and Ribbons, The Inwood Indiana Review, Five Poetry, Tanka Society of America Journal, and 50 haiku. She has published two illustrated volumes of poetry, The Healing Heart and Heaven and Hell in a Nutshell.


6 th Sonnet Crown


Blog Posted:1/31/2014 3:45:00 PM
Crown of Sonnets, 7 will be picked to win in the contest, seven that  fit  the best together.  

It is a 7-sonnet sequence in which

the last line  of  each sonnet is repeated in the first line of the  next.

The first line is repeated as the last line  of  the 7th. sonnet;
 
These will be MODERN   SONNETS, 14 lines, 10 syllables per line

 abab cdcd efef gg/ I want  flow  but strict meter is not necessary.



 [we'll try 3 at a time & pick what works best] blend your writing style with Caleb's.

REMEMBER big Boy & Girl  Pants On

1. Caleb
2. Charles Henderson
3. James Goff
4. Isaiah Zerbst
5. Roy Jerden & Kelly Deschler& binibining P. iNk    
6. Carrie Richards, Joyce Johnson & Andrea Dietrich
7. Eileen Ghali, Sarah Kendrick & Dane Ann Smith Johnson

Everyone who tries will rank, the 7 in the crown will get a first place. 

 

Stone in the Cold

By Caleb Smith


#1 Caleb Smith
 Through the North's dark I come a stealthy hand
who but a man shadowed could be so bold?
My eyes hunt, take a reckon of the land,
look into the hollows, constant and cold.

My companion's solitude still as stone.
I  am the seeker of winds, and of scent.
By the trees yonder, I wait not alone;
my aim is true, and my purpose unbent.

Yet, death does not bring a smile to my  lips,
 nor a lift unto this wayfaring heart;
 in grief I am fed,  from silence I sip,
 and from the old wood, I shall never part.

Caleb am I, a hunter true, and I pursue
a life that no death can ever undo.

#2 Charles Henderson 

A life that no death can ever undo,
for  there are portals I've yet to find.
Hidden life in the green I wish to pursue,
oh, the secrets of life and death entwine.   

I search and search, I will know no defeat.
Each corner turned will find new paths to tread.
The deer or  the  bear, the fox that I meet
will reveal the secrets of life not death.

So, let the wood talk, hear what it reveals.
Riddle its meanings there to be understood.
The less armor worn, we brandish or wield,
higher truth follows our message of good. 

Come into the woods as in days of youth,
we  still face the test of absolute truth.

 #3 of 3 James Goff

We still face the test of absolute truth,
the nights coming fast, I travel unheard.
The reverence I feel, was born in youth,
tempered by sage, burnt offerings for birds.

Tormented by brambles whose thorns I collect
I come to remains of struggles long gone,
feathers and crushed bone, on these I  reflect.
I'm hoping once more, my arms are still  strong.

A pine marten scurries, close to my step,
the sweet scent of birch gum, his claws unearth.
My arrow's still sheathed, for creeks I have leapt.
though I grow cold, my spirit is rebirths.

Tracks at the creek, the water I savor
the brush moves, my aim must never waver. 

#4 Isaiah Z

The brush moves, my aim must never waver;
with strengthened arms, I bend my bow of yew:
my eyes pierce the  brush, intent to savor
the sights of a good hunt, an arrow true.

The  bracken parts, rattling, empty sighs;
 my draw fingers quake from the constant  chill.
My quarries' breath floats to the clouded sky;
my own breath  muffled as I track my kill.

Overhead, an arrow in deadly arc
speeds  toward the bear I'm seeking, still as stone;
a shadow moves, the arrow strikes its mark.
The hand that looses the shaft is not my own.

I am a man shadowed; death comes knocking:
The hunter hunted; the past comes a stalking.

#5 Roy
The hunter hunted; the past comes stalking
as three men in the high grasses arise
they're enemies all, my skill they mock
they wounded the bear, now they want their prize.

From my quiver I load, I pull, the shaft flies
there's one man down, but two others advance
I round the still bear, turn toward their eyes
buck knife in hand, I fight on in a trance.

My senses heighten, I exult in pain
So crisp is each leaf and each grassy blade.
So fresh the air, and each wet drop of rain.
Three down and the bear wounded in the glade.

Death songs stir memories for this woodland.
Ahead, the bear in sudden motion stands.

#6

Ahead, the bear in sudden motion stands.             

 The CLIMAX needs to be at the END of 5 or BEGINNING of 6

Ok here where we are Caleb [who we have naked with a muffler & a bow  quill & a buck knife -nice look by the way hubba hubba] in the North woods, there are ferns thorns & birch tree deer, bear, fox, pine martins

3 enemies are down [out of the fight for now - sure if they are totally incapacitated, will revive or dead] the bear is wounded [we don't know if it's a mortal wound] It's cold enough to see your breath [so like 32? degrees Fahrenheit] cold, wet. Since Jimbo did burnt offering he has matches - probably in his quiver?

We don't know the time of day but to see shadows it is day. Do you all see how we have MOVED HIM NOWHERE

so from verse 1-5 we had him stand, think, observe, load his bow shoot down 1 man grab his buck knife [I guess he dropped the bow BUT the quiver is still attached to him] fight to incapacitate 2 more mean around the body of a wounded bear & the bear alone REVIVES

What does the naked hunter do now, what time of day is it? He must be freezing? hungry? thirsty? TIRED? and alone in the same spot he started in the North woods. [Apparently he didn't get wounded at all during all this?]

BE VERY SENSORY STAY IN FIRST PERSON PRESENT TENSE

This is not you, it is not your voice [ie the language you use] it is not your morals. Don't say "I would never say that or I would never do that ... if you read Caleb's blog you can get

IN CHARACTER

The is Caleb, the place is simply the woods, the man thinks...thinks.. he is being shadowed night is falling [how does he react to the night coming on when he thinks he is being shadowed?] no mention is made yet of how far from home he is or what his
supplies are, does he have a camp set up? does he have to set a camp up with dark coming on? He's too far in the woods to get home now before full dark. Is there an old hunters cabin or a hunters platform he can go to? where the water? What's he eating? Is he cold? Perhaps there is no shadow perhaps he has a fever mounting?


 [no fantasy or magic, a real person in real time, who hunts to put food on his table not for sport a woodsman who has hunted since he was a child]





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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 9:25:00 AM
    I don't see anyone stating that he is naked. Why do you say he is? I don't see any naked hunters running around in our northwoods.

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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 8:49:00 AM
    Deb, he is obviously moving in some direction when it was said "I come to remains of struggles long gone," and then also "close to my step," also, "for creeks I have leapt." and..."Tracks at the creek," All this was from Jimbo's sonnet. So our Caleb is clearly moving...steps... and tracking something down by the creek....

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    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey Date: 2/4/2014 8:52:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    and let us all assume he has clothes on.... LOL... some of the great poets never described how their heroes, or heroines were dressed, it was an implied factor...LOL you are so funny :)
  1. Date: 2/4/2014 8:37:00 AM
    Hi Deb, I haven't seen anyone copy and past this yet, would you like me to give it a try? hugs, catie

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    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey Date: 2/4/2014 8:40:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    i can do it easily...
  1. Date: 2/4/2014 7:56:00 AM
    Okies Guys Jimbo, copy everything above from this page YOU put the blog up NOW I can't even start a new blog! grrrrrrrrrr - and we have a naked mufflered, bow,quiver& buck knife carrying caleb tired, wet, cold with 3 downed men somewhere in the north woods in the ferns & thickets WITH a wounded BEAR- JIMBO used the revised version of Roy's ONLY put up sonnets 1-5 cut out the rest

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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 7:13:00 AM
    Ok if I can get the blog page to copy all for me I will use the rewrite of Roy's & Mark, when we are done, we can go back and tweak the meter [we have to plot to the end] all & all I wish we had actually shown what Caleb looked like but it's TOO LATE now

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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 6:49:00 AM
    Also really like imagination in Kelly's re-work....the "camo coat" line, bit weak...

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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 6:43:00 AM
    love Roys too....just have hesitation 'bout the weak line "there's one man down"

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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 3:46:00 AM
    On poem number 5, I didn't really consider p.ink's because of her disregard of the syllable count which was a stipulation of 10 syllables. I liked KD best but his version not Deb's quite as much. The story line wasn't quite as good as the rewrite of Roy's. So, I will have to vote for Roys for the good of total crown. If we can redo Kd's closer to the story line and still preserve his write. I would be happier. As it is---- Yea Roy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 1:24:00 AM
    Ok my vote goes to K.D. original one as it not only stays very close to caleb's theme but it also has elements of his as well, it is intense as well as mysterious, voices from brooks, eyes are everywhere, something is near....very good.

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  1. Date: 2/4/2014 12:49:00 AM
    Honestly, and this pains, all three seem choppy and in need of polish, not far short of rewrite. Of all, I like Roy's original, which needs only a tweak or two and a bit more drama.

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  1. Date: 2/3/2014 11:36:00 PM
    If we don't want gore why are we writing a hunting sonnet? The rhyme is compromised in the third verse of K.D.s 2nd version. I still vote for Roys.

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    Peterson Avatar Mark Peterson Date: 2/4/2014 12:51:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Amen.
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 9:46:00 PM
    Diggin' the Nikko re-write! Oh yeah!!!

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  1. Date: 2/3/2014 9:09:00 PM
    Soup working on fixing my blog page I can't copy this to a new blog with verse 5 until the do [sigh]

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 9:21:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    if it's not fixed by tomorrow morning I figured out a way around it.
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 9:08:00 PM
    I'm not quit sure what's being asked of me, but I will say that my fave sonnet of all the ones here is #3. Earthy without being smarmy, I like that. Thanks for inviting me to your blog, Debbie, is cool to read you and see some old friends here! Namaste ~N

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  1. Date: 2/3/2014 8:33:00 PM
    This is so hard, but I think I'll pick the last version, just for the new twist to the poem. :) They are all so great!

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  1. Date: 2/3/2014 7:14:00 PM
    I like Nikko's but it makes me want to "get romantic" with the next sonnet and I think the one by Roy would make me want to keep talking about nature, so I vote for that one.

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 7:20:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    man I wish they'd fix my blog page
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 10:40:00 AM
    ok last one I think-- the ending couplet is so different from how I wrote it, oh shucks :(! I was trying to be coherent to Isaiah's sonnet, wherein there was an arrow shot by someone else-- and I tried to address that there PLUS the idea of the "past stalking" enters in as well, with that hand being of the huntress-- someone from the past of the hunter, and also somehow referring back to Caleb's line of "I wait not alone" --it could have a double meaning of other animals or persons. Sorry if I nitpicked here a bit... hope you understand. It's not that I am not open to suggestions, I just feel the need to explain why I wrote it in that manner...

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    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 1:04:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I enjoyed writing this, made me explore some stuff I wouldn't normally write, thank you.
    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 1:00:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    as for me not showing the hunter being hit by the arrow, for me it does-- thus the "beads of sweat"-- for me that shows some kind of reaction from the wound. Hmm, as for searing, I don't mean sear as in verb, but as in adjective, as in describing the type of pain? A piercing kind of pain? Ok, have to sleep now :)
    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 12:57:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    It's ok if my plot wasn't used, seriously, I just enjoyed putting up my ideas for this, I don't want it to appear that I am pushing for my plot (I think Roy's and Kelly's are very interesting), so I won't say how I think my last couplet does have potential, I explained already below why I wrote it as such---
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 12:43:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    line 4 the bear is wounded by the man line 12 I took [keeled] as in keeled over - okies - let's see whose plot get picked?
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 12:42:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    if your plot is used your last couplet is not forward moving enough of the plot - verse one is basically the same content only changed for syllable count & clarity, verse 2 line 1 the man is wounded by the bear, [your line one does not show the hunter winged by an arrow - too tricky seared is what meat does when touched by hot metal]
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 10:33:00 AM
    Another one-- again, L4S3 kind of bugged me as well, since I didn't know how to bring the message across right--but what I was trying to imply there was the disbelief that the bear suddenly keels over, and not by the hands of the hunter---from how I interpret the revised line, it's more like disbelief from being attacked by the bear-- or maybe I didn't read it right?

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  1. Date: 2/3/2014 10:23:00 AM
    Sorry, I feel some of the ties I put in there got lost in the revision...Admittedly, I was a bit vague in my 2nd stanza-about Who actually had that flesh wound-- the bear or the hunter? It's pretty open for interpretation, in my mind though, it was the hunter that was wounded this time (ths "the hunter hunted"-- but yes, either way, there WAS a second shot of an arrow (implied by quivering of leaves and the word "sears"-- I'm no expert, but I can only imagine a shot of an arrow would have a searing kind of pain)--it makes for more suspense, both of them being wounded--but yes, a niggling thought for me as I wrote this? why would he be shot at? accident or intentional? it remains to be seen I guess. cont'd

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    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 10:27:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    ok, i know my own quivering line is a bit vague, but with the revision, it's still a bit vague as to how the flesh wound appears? was it done by the hunter? or by the bear?
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 10:16:00 AM
    Hi! Ok, umm I see some revisions have been made (I have no qualms with the syllable changes) but yes, I do have some concerns over some of the changes, Debbie-- I hope it's ok if I point it out and Why... it sort of deviates from what I had in mind (and yup, I am keeping the previous sonnets in mind) hear me out pls and bear with me, it's gonna be kinda long-- oops, I know I keep going on about my captchas--they are freaky it says "mum" now, but nope, I won't be mum, haha

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    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 1:09:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    it definitely could ;) ok really going now...sorry if I kind of hogged this blog-- won't be here much tomorrow, that's why...oh one last, yes, it was "keeled" over but another party caused it to, it keeled over After the hunter is on the ground...thus the disbelief. sorry I explain myself too much, maybe I wasn't so clear with how I wrote things, sorry.
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 12:30:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    maybe it mean Ma, mummy, mommy ;)
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 9:46:00 AM
    I'm waiting on Cyndi's invective for use of the "huntress" term. Just kidding...

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 3:14:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    nothing wrong with it nikko, Dee objects to being called a poetess, Dee is a person the comment was to her, the huntress is a fiction figure.
    Jerden Avatar Roy Jerden Date: 2/3/2014 1:28:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Sorry, kind of an inside joke. I don't have a problem with huntress. However, if your poem is picked, and it is already established that there is a huntress, it might be more effective to not reveal that until close to the end of the complete crown, to add an element of surprise. Maybe we can get a name from Caleb, otherwise I suggest Diana, of course.
    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 10:47:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    yes, she definitely is! please don't let me change the word "huntress"! What's wrong with the word "huntress"???
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 10:03:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    LOL Dee will let me be me ... and this woman is the hero! So I'm fine ;) ;)
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 8:39:00 AM
    I'd like you to NOTE the SEEING added to Kelly's we now know how Caleb is dressed for the weather and where his camp is and have a scene set up for more suspense BUT possible safety ... FROM the climax we must slowly roll to the end, a firm conclusion with a 2 line more or less moral?

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  1. Date: 2/3/2014 8:37:00 AM
    I like Nikko's.. :) Only a huntress can pull poor Caleb out of this mess! HA! :)

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    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 10:50:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thank you, Catie :)! Wouldn't that be cool if they also help each other out, hunter saves her too somewhere along the road?
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 7:08:00 AM
    The two lines below now have only 9 syllables as both have been changed from what I submitted. The 2nd one now has the word "stands" instead of "descends", so this word is used in both of the last two lines of the poem. I don't see this an an improvement./ "wait his pounce upright and unafraid."/ "A deadly still stands upon these lands"

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    Jerden Avatar Roy Jerden Date: 2/3/2014 8:37:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    OK, thanks. Fix when you can.
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 8:35:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    sorry Roy as I said the cut and paste function of the blog isn't working & I had to hand type jumping back & forth front the Word program to the blog page, it was just a mistake on my part, let's see whose plot line is picked, I notified Soup of the blog page problem last night, it's not fixed yet.
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 6:50:00 AM
    Okies folks - which plot line are we going on with Roy's, Kelly's or Nikko's?

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  1. Date: 2/3/2014 6:09:00 AM
    Caleb's companion, is possibly a dog, another tool of the hunter. It senses things, will fight to death protecting its master, etc. Hunting is spiritual to Caleb, killing doesn't make him feel good, but it's a necessity.

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 6:51:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    yup would have been a good add in verse 2 Marlon.
  1. Date: 2/3/2014 1:09:00 AM
    Just to let everyone know, my original poem was inspired by Caleb's story, about how the forest can have a haunted feel to it, sometimes. So, I thought maybe this hunter from the past may be a ghost, and not a living person. I just thought it would be an interesting story...Debbie, I have read the comments below, and if you would like to add more action to my poem, then you may do so. :)

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    Deschler Avatar Kelly Deschler Date: 2/3/2014 2:57:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thank you, Debbie. I understand what you meant about my poem not fitting with the current storyline. And, I do understand why the changes had to be made to my poem. :)
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 6:48:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Yes Kelly well done beautifully done, adding to it would simply be because of its placement in the whole thing, this would have worked without change for verse 3 or 4 & thank you so much TODAY WE DECIDE
  1. Date: 2/2/2014 9:38:00 PM
    I vote for Roy's. there is movement in it that gives coming writers something to start with toward a climax and finish. Joyce

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  1. Date: 2/2/2014 7:43:00 PM
    Nikko....love everything 'bout yer sonnet! Story...Action....Suspense...."these thoughts hound me as I clutch my knife close" for me, sounds smoother? Everything else...ACES! jimbo

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    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 10:53:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Thanks so much, Jimbo, glad you enjoyed it :)! I really am kind of clueless when it comes to meter-- thanks for your suggestion but the end rhyme becomes different-- since I had "life" in the 2nd line, Debbie's revision was also good
  1. Date: 2/2/2014 7:38:00 PM
    "There, above me up the hill, a tree blind!"...Kelly ...love your story! Here's a thought for this line to smooth it out? Jimbo

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/3/2014 8:57:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Jimbo I try hard to keep the original intent & end rhyme patterns the poet has established, I think both line changes you have brought up do flow better but I think [hard to be sure constantly scrolling up & down] but you have changed the end rhyme & that snow balls!
  1. Date: 2/2/2014 6:59:00 PM
    Thank you Craig the blog page is not working so I haven't been able to add Nikko's revised verse

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  1. Date: 2/2/2014 5:24:00 PM
    Great job on this Debbie----this is the kind of blog that helps us all---anyone who wasn't used has nothing to do with the quality of their sonnet but the way it may or not blend with the theme you and Caleb created with the initial sonnet in the crown. This, in essence, is a crown that you are creating with the inspiration of many poets and personally I love it and everything it has inspired and thank you for the muse.

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  1. Date: 2/2/2014 11:18:00 AM
    Maybe I should have written about a yak? That's what my captcha is saying, that or my sonnet is yakky, whatever that could mean. I would honestly be happy if either Roy's or Kelly's versions were used, so much possibilities with theirs... I am happy as it is to have written something for this, thank yoiu! Off to sleep I go.

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    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/3/2014 10:55:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    It is there, but oops, I think it could have been killed? Or maybe just badly wounded? That could be!
    Dietrich Avatar Andrea Dietrich Date: 2/2/2014 11:38:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    oh, no, not a yak!! The bear has to be tHERE !!!
  1. Date: 2/2/2014 10:39:00 AM
    I like the revised poem with the bear back in the story. Hope K.D did not mind the revision. I hope either of these versions is chosen because the bear needs to be in the story, and not a dead bear but a threatening one!! There is one more being written?

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    na Avatar wala na Date: 2/2/2014 11:13:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    just finished it, Andrea-- now I have droopy eyes....
  1. Date: 2/2/2014 10:39:00 AM
    In the last one above...I prefer.."a snowy owl" drop the word "and" there is no such bird called "snow owl" but "snowy owl" YES! I have seen but one in my life up north in the woodlands...jimbo

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  1. Date: 2/2/2014 10:34:00 AM
    In response to what was said about the August movie with Meryl Streep. Many movies are pointless but they should at least be INTERESTING. well, as an avid movie goer, I have to say, I agree with Debs on this one. This movie puts the DYS in Dysfunctional family. It had a few good parts .Surely the critics like it for SOME reason. Maybe for the acting!! but guys, the movie to see is LABOR DAY. OMG, best movie of the new year so far!!!

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    MacMillan Avatar Cyndi MacMillan Date: 2/2/2014 3:24:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    There are a few out there, Debs, who actually have lived outside the dysfunctional realm. Parents happily married, siblings all get along, no addictions, no abuse. I met some recently and I tried not to stare at them like they were aliens. LOL
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/2/2014 12:30:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    yes wonderful acting by why would they think anyone would want to go THERE with someone elses family we all have our own and can barely take them 2 or 3 times a year!
  1. Date: 2/2/2014 9:54:00 AM
    I haven't much time. OH JOY family is visiting US... it rarely happens. We are almost always the ones packing up and traveling hours. Hey all, I am so moved reading down... seeing not only a crown being constructed, but PEERS and dear friends coming together and sharing a passion for word, putting art above all else, swaying with the breeze. Kudos to all who are trying on sonnets for size for the first time or are returning to a form they had once been smitten with, but had abandoned in that poetic drive for exploration. God bless Bet for her hard, exhaustive work, her passion for showing others the beauty in forms and for her love of all soupers... love to all. Happy Sunday xoxox

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    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey Date: 2/2/2014 10:08:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Really, Deb? That was the one I wanted to see.... pointless...now maybe i will see it just to see if I agree with you. LOL No, I will probably choose something else instead now. LOL Have fun with your family, Cyndi. hugs and love to all. Go Seahawks! (They are a second-half team, so just remember...its not over till it's over.
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/2/2014 10:01:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    YIKES Dee family coming [gird your loins!] PS do not go see August in Osage County with Meryl Streep! OMG That has to be the biggest POINTLESS bum out family movie I have ever seen.
  1. Date: 2/2/2014 7:48:00 AM
    Good morning, everyone! Go Seahawks! :) Kelly, this is a lovely sonnet you've penned, yet... to me, there is just not enough action...in this the 5th sonnet, the climax should be fully revealed, yet... it feels to me like your sonnet is still LEADING to a climax...Just my thoughts... hugs, Catie :)

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/2/2014 10:02:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Kelly may wish to take another whack at it Roy is onto his third idea, nikko hasn't started yet
    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey Date: 2/2/2014 9:50:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Yep! it's looking much better. Kelly's original was lovely, just not enough action for me.
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/2/2014 8:47:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    yes Catie I too feel this way, I will begin tweaking ;)
  1. Date: 2/1/2014 9:18:00 PM
    Isaiah stated...another's hand loosed the shaft....our man must survive...something must befall the others....terminal or not...matters not to me!

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    Goff Avatar James Marshall Goff Date: 2/2/2014 10:31:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Schneikies....you make creative points...you smart Lady...; )
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/2/2014 7:00:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    the main character is making that assumption because he thought he was alone in the woods now he is fearful he is NOT death can stalk in many forms [hypothermia, weather, a fall, a fever, no shelter, no food] & also death doesn't have to catch him YET
  1. Date: 2/1/2014 9:11:00 PM
    It would have been ok to say: my skill they're mocking (and also it gives exact rhyme with stalking!)

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/2/2014 6:56:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    yup it was that way
  1. Date: 2/1/2014 5:33:00 PM
    Debbie has sanitized my first version, full of blood and guts and Indian warriors. I apparently went off the reservation. Anyway, I'll see what I can do. I'll likely make up a different poem with my original material.

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    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey Date: 2/1/2014 9:57:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I enjoyed your original sonnet more than this version. and I do like your thoughts on where to take the 5th sonnet. Very nice, Roy. :)
    Dietrich Avatar Andrea Dietrich Date: 2/1/2014 9:08:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    I am not like the other women, roy. I don't mind a story where a hunter kills three guys who were on his trail. But as they say, to fit with Caleb's first sonnet, it is better to make the fight end up between man and animal. I love the ending with the bear rising up!
    Jerden Avatar Roy Jerden Date: 2/1/2014 7:51:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Actually, Debbie put in the knife work. I had one tomahawk throw, which likely wounded, no killing was involved. See my poem. http://www.poetrysoup.com/poems_poets/poem_detail.aspx?ID=539548
    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey Date: 2/1/2014 7:33:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    LOL yes, I see. But I still think it would serve the climax better if the violence was between caleb and the bear. More in keeping with the story line...
    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 2/1/2014 7:02:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Hey Catie ..I took out the hatch scene ;) if we used the one above at least it doesn't SAY he killed them, they're just 'down' ;) ;) See Roy :P the gals would have headed for the hills if they read your version ;)
    Lindsey Avatar Catie Lindsey Date: 2/1/2014 6:44:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Roy, I am sorry, but... the killing of humans? It just turns me off from the whole poem.... can't you take it in a different direction? Sorry, but that's me.
  1. Date: 2/1/2014 11:32:00 AM
    we don't know what he looks like, or how he's dressed, right now he's naked with muffler ;), a bow & arrow and a quiver - we know the woods has yews & bracken [ferns]- is he wet? is he dry? what does the woods smell like? does he smell of fear?

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    Dietrich Avatar Andrea Dietrich Date: 2/1/2014 9:06:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    where do you get he is naked with muffler? what does that even mean?
  1. Date: 1/31/2014 9:25:00 PM
    Awesome, awesome sonnet, Isaiah! truly. The crown is coming along very nicely. where will it go from here?...

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  1. Date: 1/31/2014 8:52:00 PM
    I'm trying ... Deborah .... I'm trying but I have nothing to say. : (

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  1. Date: 1/31/2014 8:51:00 PM
    Bravo Debbie Good choice---Isaiah did a great job on this and a great line to work with on the next sonnet. Much fun to work with and learn from.

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    cornish Avatar craig cornish Date: 1/31/2014 8:52:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Sorry Isaiah---bravo to you!!
  1. Date: 1/31/2014 8:50:00 PM
    I'm trying ... Deborah .... I'm trying but I have nothing to say. : (

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  1. Date: 1/31/2014 8:48:00 PM
    I'm trying ... Deborah .... I'm trying but I have nothing to say. : (

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  1. Date: 1/31/2014 6:12:00 PM
    This is getting exciting! I will get started on my sonnet, Debbie. I was just wondering, how much time do I have to send you my poem?

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 1/31/2014 6:51:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    As soon as possible Kelly, the process is exciting for me too but wearing!
  1. Date: 1/31/2014 4:44:00 PM
    Deb...this needs to be published...you got sumthin' up yer sleeve?

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    Guzzi Avatar Debbie Guzzi Date: 1/31/2014 5:20:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    It can't be hon the problems would be astronomical - too many don't take things they already think of as published [anything put up on Soup!] and then 7 people would need to sign off on it too much work for a publisher
  1. Date: 1/31/2014 4:40:00 PM
    Col...cool...cool! Incredibly exciting! This IS EPIC!

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My Past Blog Posts

 
Global Secret Santas
Date Posted: 12/4/2014 2:31:00 PM
What Does the X in Xmas Stand For?
Date Posted: 12/2/2014 11:56:00 AM
Peace Through Understanding Using Poetry & Art
Date Posted: 11/12/2014 3:54:00 PM
Chan Hurst
Date Posted: 11/8/2014 9:07:00 AM
The World is FULL of Good Books
Date Posted: 11/6/2014 8:44:00 AM
Things That Make You Go Hmmm
Date Posted: 10/11/2014 10:48:00 PM
The Power and Peril of Punctuation
Date Posted: 10/9/2014 8:49:00 AM
Aiming for Poetry as an ART
Date Posted: 10/4/2014 2:19:00 PM
More, More, More
Date Posted: 9/30/2014 5:22:00 PM
Published Poetry of the 21st Century [not mine]
Date Posted: 9/28/2014 2:41:00 PM
HELP the Meow Meow Pussycats!!!
Date Posted: 9/8/2014 3:54:00 PM
What Does Debbie Sound Like???
Date Posted: 8/29/2014 11:53:00 AM
Eunoia Review
Date Posted: 8/23/2014 7:58:00 AM
Doowop
Date Posted: 7/30/2014 3:16:00 PM
Thank Ruben! OH Oh, Mr. O
Date Posted: 7/24/2014 7:38:00 PM
SHUF Home of Experimental Poetics
Date Posted: 7/22/2014 3:52:00 PM
Grrrr PS please STOP
Date Posted: 7/17/2014 8:27:00 AM
Dead Snakes
Date Posted: 7/15/2014 11:30:00 AM
I got 'splaining to Do!
Date Posted: 7/7/2014 11:03:00 AM
Sijo
Date Posted: 6/14/2014 3:42:00 PM
Tincture - A Fine Magazine
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Smart and Small, Yet Says it All
Date Posted: 6/1/2014 5:42:00 PM
I'm Waiting!!
Date Posted: 5/27/2014 8:22:00 PM
Help Me
Date Posted: 5/17/2014 12:40:00 PM
Last Call Anyone Else want help? Spring haiku Contest
Date Posted: 5/13/2014 11:37:00 AM

My Recent Poems

Date PostedPoemTitleFormCategories
12/10/2014 A Christmas Snow Villanellechildren,
12/1/2014 Le Buff Claus - What's Up With Santa Rhymefantasy,funny,
11/25/2014 Death Muses of ISIS Verseafrica,violence,war,
11/24/2014 Chopped III-Suicidal Dick's Prose Poetrymystery,
11/23/2014 A Supreme Summer Free versework,
11/23/2014 Frozen in Crystalline - Number 7 Crystallinefaith,
11/17/2014 illusions of man Blitzabsence,beauty,bereavemen
11/14/2014 Tyree Gits the Boot Limerickcowboy,
11/8/2014 Clue II Haibunmystery,
11/7/2014 A Heart of Gold Versebeauty,father,friendship,
11/6/2014 Pie Eyed Sonnetfood,
11/2/2014 Boxers Versesports,
10/30/2014 Astral Ash Biofarewell,
10/29/2014 ashes fall from the joss stick: finger bone Prose Poetrydeath,
10/22/2014 Blessed Outcomes Alexandrinedesire,devotion,love,myth
10/21/2014 Above the Broad Versemen,woman,
10/21/2014 The Oracle's Descent Rispettomythology,
10/20/2014 The Party's Over Versebetrayal,
10/20/2014 Fall's Bounty Sonnetbeauty,
10/15/2014 Dark Angels of Highgate Sestinadeath,
10/3/2014 Destiny Number 5 Limerickfunny,
9/30/2014 Forever Blowing Bubbles Limerickhumor,
9/29/2014 Autumn Acrosticautumn,
9/28/2014 Free Form Verselife,
9/23/2014 Eccentric Eyes Sonnetpain,
9/23/2014 Hiding Places Haibunabuse,
9/23/2014 Daddies Girl Free versechildhood,
9/16/2014 Holy is the Lamb Free versepeople,philosophy,
9/3/2014 The Devil Made Me Do It Haibunanger,feelings,relationsh
9/2/2014 Watching the Shadows Grow Trioletnature,
8/29/2014 Petty-Cured Abecedarianfunny,
8/26/2014 Love Froze the Flame Ghazallost love,love,
8/21/2014 Mist Rise Ottava rimabeauty,
8/19/2014 Bewitching Power Rhymemen,power,
8/15/2014 Unknown Innocence Sonnetfaith,
8/13/2014 Mi Corazon Lyricromance,
8/12/2014 What Ever Gets You Through the Night Versefaith,
8/7/2014 Prayer for Harvest Versesky,
8/4/2014 Black Ships Sail Tail-rhymeabsence,
7/31/2014 The Sky Larked Moon Versemoon,
7/31/2014 White Shoulder Dreams Free versemissing you,
7/31/2014 Masked at Midnight Blitzmurder,mystery,
7/28/2014 Velvet as Laughter - Blitz Versejoy,
7/24/2014 Soar Among Stars Versegrowth,
7/22/2014 Peek A Boo Versebaby,
7/19/2014 Ride Sally Ride Balladsexy,
7/19/2014 sun shower Haikucelebration,
7/19/2014 Turtle Bridge Free versemythology,
7/17/2014 The Scent of Water Verselife,
7/15/2014 The Great Turtle and Sky Woman Rhymemythology,
7/12/2014 The Clarity of Eye Sonnetuplifting,visionary,
7/11/2014 Shattered Stages Verseloss,
7/4/2014 Debbie's Rhyme Schema Versefun,
7/1/2014 Moonlight Kisses Ghazalsea,
6/25/2014 Somnabulant Sijonature,
6/24/2014 Going Down Limericklust,
6/24/2014 Dick's Pick Limerickgirlfriend,
6/24/2014 Penance Versefaith,
6/17/2014 Lord Harry's Front Limerickfunny,gender,
6/13/2014 Sea Saw Versesea,
6/10/2014 Dream Catchers Sijoappreciation,change,
6/9/2014 Glass Bells Free versebeauty,
6/7/2014 The Virgin, the Villian and the Black Dog Sonnetlost love,
6/2/2014 Munch's Moon Verselonely,longing,
5/18/2014 Smiling Charmed Versetime,
5/17/2014 The Day's Mourning Terzanellebereavement,
5/16/2014 blonde bombshell Senryudeath,
5/16/2014 I See Your Shell Terza Rimaabuse,introspection,sad l
5/15/2014 Awash Terzanellenature,sad,
5/15/2014 Picture Perfect Versebeauty,
5/15/2014 Sunset Compliment Dizainbeauty,
5/7/2014 MacCool's Tool Limerickallusion,humor,
5/2/2014 The Red Tide Kyriellechildhood,violence,war,wi
4/30/2014 Antique Knights Ghazalcar,cool,
4/22/2014 Blood Moon Coupletchange,death,eulogy,
4/22/2014 -drainpipes rattle on - Tanka Tankaspring,
4/21/2014 Thunder Dome Sonnetlife,
4/17/2014 Wolf Pacts Sonnetpolitical,pollution,pover
4/17/2014 Thread Time Verseuplifting,
4/16/2014 Itty Bitty Spring Tankanature,
4/16/2014 Wind Born Free versedream,
4/12/2014 Crest Fallen Versecolor,
4/8/2014 Skin Deep Free versemagic,
4/7/2014 Dark And Mystical Versenight,
4/5/2014 Tick Tock - Itty Bitty Free verseage,funny,
4/4/2014 Sweety Peeps Versecandy,child,
4/2/2014 Trash Talkin' Free versepoems,
4/1/2014 The Handy Man Limerickfunny,funny love,
3/28/2014 March Goosebumps Sonnetspring,wind,
3/23/2014 St Catherine's Wheel Free versesky,
3/19/2014 He Crowed the Night Free versenight,
3/15/2014 Memories on the Branch Rhymeseasons,
3/14/2014 Crotches and Scotches Limerickfunny,
3/13/2014 Pushing the Envelope Free versespring,
3/13/2014 Truth Limerickfunny,
3/7/2014 Life is What You Make It Sonnetloss,
2/28/2014 Dewberry Cobbler Haibungrowing up,
2/24/2014 Remember Kent State Free versewar,
2/22/2014 What's White Got to Do With It Rhymenostalgia,parody,
2/21/2014 The Naughty Boy Quatraincare,

My Photos


Fav Poems

PoemTitleFormCategories
God Free verselife,mystery,
Hard Times Cowboycowboy-western,family,fun
For Things Once Counted Rhymeintrospection,loss,uplift
Petal Verselove,
Defender of the Wastes Free verseart,life,parody,world,
Birth Imagismchildhood,life
this is why i woo words Verseart,inspirational,philoso
Forbear Free versesad,
Belongings Rhymeloss,love,mother,peacewor
Gold Fever Free versefaithfaith,political,
Splattered I do not know?life
Echo Quatrainlost lovewords,love,
Bells (after Poe) Lyricpassion
Respectfully, Emily Dickinson Lyricintrospection
Give the End Back to the Beginning Free versededication,faithme,
The Bruised and Rotting Pear Coupletfaith,hope
fly Free verseanimals
ABC's for a Young Captain ABClife
Not Entirely About Living In New York Free verselifeworld,light,light,
Woodcutter I do not know?warold,old,
Dreams Free versefaith,forgiveness
A Feed of Chips Narrativefunny
Weep O Willows Versedeath
Harlem Blues Free verseblack-african amerchildre
Summers Everlasting Free versenostalgia
EASTER IVY Narrativefriendshipeaster,,cousin,
The Sowing Free versedevotion,
End of days Rhymeinspirational,lifeme,war,
Past-Life Nightmare Narrativemystery,autumn,
I dream of you (to JEW) Free verseimagination,lovenight,swe
jellyfish back strophe Imagismallegory,nature,on writin
Disposable Wisdom Rhymeage,cat,life,wisdom,
Loneliness Rhymeintrospection,life
Remission (In Memory of William Watt). Elegybrother,death,nostalgiawo
The Day That Died Forever Free verseadventure,angst,art,confu
Heritage Quatrainadventure,cowboy-western,
Summer Matinee Narrativebrother,me,
The Moon and I I do not know?hope,life,love,nature,pea
Seeking, Searching Free verseimaginationlove,
BEFORE SPRING CAME Narrativeadventure,animals,childho
Pledge Sonnetdevotion
Wild Cherry Tree Free versechildhood,devotion,nature
Words from the Oracle Layallegory,philosophy
Science Free verse 
Mona Lisa resembles Chokaart
AND WITH MERRIEST SPIRIT Quintain (English)faith,father,holiday,insp
Cotton-Pickin' Paradise Versechildhood,life,nostalgia,
Where The Sycamore Grew Free verseautumn,family,house,life,
Larks Free versedeath,devotion,imaginatio
Big Bang Limerickfunny,science
winter (do not forget among the loss of flowers) me Free verse 
Let I do not know?loveme,me,
He Was Smoking Hot I do not know?funny
Alabaster Night Free versenature,sea,
Haunted Orb Haikufantasy,nature
This Night Sonnet 
Tombstones & Teacups Rhymeallegory,childhood,death,
Today Not Tomorrow Free versededication,depression,gir
Years Of The Rose Free verselost love,loveday,
The Joy that Sweetly Stays Free versehappinessjoy,
Cinder Girl Rhymelovelove,
Biography (Thesis Statement) Versehistory,life,philosophyli
Figure Fusion Verseart,sports
Dancing Bird - with video link Free verseanimals,introspection,nat
Poem for a sensuous poet Free versefantasy,on writing and wo
The Road Walked Down Through the Years Rhymelife,on writing and words
The Iceman Cometh! Rhymenostalgia
He says/ She says Narrativelife
I've seen so many Sonnetintrospectionnight,night,
Searching for Michelangelo Free verseart,hope,life,people,imag
When Madness Rides on Moonlight Sestinalovegod,light,god,life,li
Falling Stars Free versehopestar,star,
Before the City Wakes Sonnet 
realisation of self (War Child) Free verseme,me,
Reporting Live On The Soup (Colorado) Rhymefunnyme,me,
Late at night Lyricimaginationme,fear,me,
Reverencing Nature Balladfaith,naturenature,heart,
Dreams Coupletimagination
Simple Pleasures Rhymehappinesssummer,summer,
I Exist Pantoumintrospectionlife,me,
Leaving Madrid Blank versenostalgia,travel
Magnolia Song Free verselove,romance,
yellow bus roars through Haikuallegory,nature,places
Ethel's Remedies Rhymefunny,people
A Dream In The Mist Narrativefantasy,imagination,natur
volga 1 - 3 Prose Poetryfantasy
Mama's Cleaning Quatrainintrospection,life,mother
UPROOTING THE HEART VEINS Free verseangst,hope,mysteryme,
Revelation Free verseimagination,lifesong,epic
Sports Limerick Limerickfunny
Don't Come Free versedeath,lost love,me,
The Snowflake Italian Sonnetgirlfriend-boyfriend,roma
Love Beyond the Pale Quatraindevotion,lost love,
Jack Lyricintrospectionlife,
Night Visions Free verselost love,passion,
The Ghost That Travels Far Personificationnature
Kite Flying - Test Free verseallegory,art,imagination,
Dining with Crow Rhymeanimals
Beauty, yes Sijohope,imagination,philosop
Smart and Final Prose Prose Poetrypeoplepeople,red,city,peo

Fav Poets

PoetCountry 
Carolyn Devonshire United States Flag United States Read
Carrie Richards United States Flag United States Read
Deirdre Omaidin Ireland Flag Ireland Read
Andrew Crisci United States Flag United States Read
Jim Fish United States Flag United States Read
Debbie Guzzi United States Flag United States Read
Nigel Fawcett Italy Flag Italy Read
L'nass Shango United States Flag United States Read
Andrea Dietrich United States Flag United States Read
Robert L. Hinshaw United States Flag United States Read
Chris D. Aechtner Canada Flag Canada Read
nette onclaud Philippines Flag Philippines Read
Sidney Beck Russian Federation Flag Russian Federation Read
Sami Al-khalili Canada Flag Canada Read
Charlotte Puddifoot United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Cyndi MacMillan Canada Flag Canada Read
T Wignesan _Not Listed Flag _Not Listed Read
Elaine George Canada Flag Canada Read
sharon Winter United States Flag United States Read
Michael Smith United States Flag United States Read
jack horne United Kingdom Flag United Kingdom Read
Catie Lindsey United States Flag United States Read