Poetry Forum

Woolgather - all messages by user

2/6/2012 6:04:07 AM
Really looking for critque!! A Thousand Eyes	Lovely sentiments and ideas, it's a shame about lve (typo) Not sure if (in your arms) is needed, it is good poetically but dis-joints that and the next two ( to me) My only other opinion is that there are so many expressions for love (it's a shame you didn't use some of the others) as over use dilutes it's meaning and poignancy. I am no expert but you asked for critical reviews (I truly hope this helps) Karen
2/6/2012 6:19:22 AM
Wishing for brute honesty(with a little fluff?)	Hello, I'm no expert but love real reviews. I can understand why you started with forlornly but I found (and all my opinions are just as I see things.) I just found myself stuttering at the start.Girl with eyes that glare (lovely). would drop when she would blink... Maybe (beauty's standards dropped as she blinked) the only other word j avoid like the plague normally replacing with a comma or( as) Is like, it just seems weak and unnecessary to me... Other than that an enjoyable gentle read which actually stands for much. Thanks Karen
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