Gratitude for the Yin and Yang of Life - Kathleen Kroll's Blog

Tonight it's hard to focus on what I'm grateful for.  It's actually been a wonderuful week and a great birthday celebration.  Unfortunately, I'm letting tonight's  disappointment mixed with some guilt feelings regarding  a poor decision overwhelm me.  

I remind myself of what I'm grateful for.  First, I'm so grateful for all the friends - online and offline - who sent me birthday greetings at age 75 .  I'm three quarters of the way to becoming another of the centenarians who are clogging the medicare and social security rolls.  And I'm so glad of it.  This is the age at which all the work you put into developing lifetime friendships pays big dividends.  Those friends with whom I have a history are irreplaceable.  They love me knowing my failures and my achievements as well as my faults and my strengths.  I count several good friends as being in this group.    

I'm especially grateful for my children's birthday greetings.  My son sent a card with a beautiful, meaningful message.  This is generally not his personality.  Both my daughters remembered in a special way.  These graces are somewhat offset by a continuing disappointment which seems more poignant now.  I had dreamed of a party to celebrate 75.   I haven't had all my children together in several years primarily due to my middle child's chronic illness.  

I'm so grateful for time with my daughter's family this week.  I've always been the "visiting grandmom" to my children'ts families.   So being within 40 minutes of my daughter this week has been so special.    The ordinary sounds of a busy house with children and a pet are ones that I don't often have the privilege of enjoying.  Unfortunately, she's not feeling well this evening and we had to cancel a gift exchange.  This combined with other feelings are overshadowing the good at this moment.

 It's the Yin and Yang.  Within the light there is always a pinpoint of darkness and withing the shadow there is always the pinpoint of light.  I am grateful for the light.