Twice Upon a Time in a Bakery

Written by: Tim Ryerson

Said baker Ted to baker Ned:
Ned, did you knead the dough?

"Dough, I did dot dead the dough"
Why not knead the dough, Ned?

"I didn't wad to sdeeze on the dough"
Sneeze on the dough, Ned?

"Yes Ded, I god a code in by doughs"
Well Ned, at yeast you’re being honest

"It’s the yeast I could do, Ded"
You’re not going to do the yeast again are you?

"Of coors dot, I did the yeast yeasterday"
You’re fibbing Ned, yeasterday was Yeaster

"I always worg Yeasters, last year I worged Yeasters"
It’s against the law to work yeasters on holidays

"Why Ded? The yeasters dode mide worging Yeasters"
Well, doing the yeast is perverted to say the yeast

"At yeast I dode loaf and fridder away by dime"
Are you accusing me of fondling the fritters?

"If the fridders fid, then fry the dab fridders"
How would you like me to fry YOUR fritters, Ned?

"I subbose I dike by fridders a diddle on the brownie dide"
Not what I meant Ned and please stop poking my brownie
"Oooo…Dough dared! You’re gibbing be the fridders"
You don't have the fritters to whip my cream, Ned

"I cad whib your cream with one had deading the dough"

Cold-ridden, frustrated customer Homer Simpson:
DOUGH!! There they dough again, Baaarge!...

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