Secret shame

Written by: Naldeem Bout

I have this secret
left untold
and to tell or leak it,
I'm not bold.
It's about me
and I carry its shame,
I'm too afraid to
give this thing name.
When I was young,
a little lad small still
I had a taste of poisins
sweetest kill.
I thought it pleasure
such sin to fullfill.
I'm now penitent,
but given to its will.
It shaped my nature
and held captive my thoughts,
creating imaginings that never
should have ought.
It grew worse
as I gave in to curse
that sickens me
in ways I cannot verse,
I wish to ask your help
but than I'd have to tell . . .
and that I cannot do
secret silenced my yell.
I cry alone and noone
could ever concieve the death
that empties me,
until im left with breath
and heartbeat,
but no will to live,
because my secret
killed what I had to give . . .