Written by: SillyBilly theKidster

MPA statement
 from recent MPA applicant
 "Hello, my name is Bill and I'm a Miserable Person."
 "Hello Bill" - standard response from the audience.
 "I no longer socialize with any family or any friends
 and I keep my distance from co workers when I am working
 and it isn't because I've stopped caring for any of them.
 It's plain and simply because I'm a miserable person
 and my company with anybody regularly would truly depress them
 causing me to inevitably be an even more miserable person.,
 knowing that I played a role in depressing them,
 and so it's truly best for all if I just avoid everyone,
 that way there will only be one instead of many miserable persons.
 Just because I'm always miserable doesn't mean I can't show some 
reasonable common descent consideration
 towards my fellow man, fellow woman, close family and close friends
 and that is why I do tend to avoid all of them.
 I don't want to be the cause in any way of possibly making 
any of them miserable persons,
 because as I have already previously mentioned,
 that would make me an even more miserable Miserable Person.
 I am most likely the most miserable among all of us.
 My name is Bill and I thank all of you so very much 
for welcoming me to Miserable Persons Anonymous."
 Damn, here's something that I certainly wasn't expecting.
 I've just gone and depressed the entire Michigan Police Association
 Apparently I'm in the wrong MPA room.
 I'll probably depress Miserable Persons Anonymous's membership too.
 There aren't many options for a miserable person to pursue.