Fat

Written by: Allison Ballard

Doubled over like a sandbag 
I examine the scars of gluttony 
And the leftovers of
 mistake cake

Little blistered trails litter
My infirm white skin
Like little red tears in my heart
They shame me, they wet my eyes
They burry my suffocating bones
Under the weight 
Of what I’ve done

And each step I take to heal 
Brandishes new stains 
Each bounding step
Unearths deep heaves in my chest
And air can’t come soon enough
The salt won’t stop building up

And I am just pile of sand
Unable to stand
Or take his hand
And be something worth a smile 
Or a kiss, or a diamond on the wrist
I am stuck in a room 
And I can’t get out 
Not here, not now
And I know that…
It’s because I am fat.