Deathbed Lament of an Everyday Person

Written by: harry horsman

(A LIFE TIME IN A DAY)
                      I
So! This is what it’s all about,
to think that the next time I
close my eyes, will be the last
time on this pretentious earth.
I’ve often wondered about this
particular time, this waiting for
the final countdown. God! Life’s
past by so quickly, here I am,
my ancient body withering away,
yet my brain so alive so active,
with vivid pages of my mind
constantly turning to any chapter
in any sequence at will.
                      II
Then I wonder why; what’s life
about, asking no doubt the same
questions as millions before me,
Why? Yes why, the great secret
being of course nobody knows,
only guessing that’s what the
powers of this earth have to
submit to, simple speculation.
                      III
I suppose I’m one of the lucky
ones, being able to die this way,
my rapid thoughts tell me. “It’s the
waiting for it to happen, that’s the
hard part, but then I spare a
thought for them that leave us in
more tragic circumstances, the very
young, with no time at all to express.
                      IV
I wonder if I’ll see all my
relations, also all of the old
faithful I have raised, not
forgetting the odd budgie. Do
hope there is not a choir, never
could stand young lads screeching
away, offending my ears in some
sort of foreign language.
                       V
Hope it is not crowded, after all
a few billion have gone before
me, maybe I’ll have no earthly
form, only a memory floating in
a tiny bubble, with the power
only to think, without the ability
to touch or feel, without the need
of sex or other carnal pursuits.
                      VI 
Can’t say I have ever harmed
anyone, or stolen from anyone
who could not afford to lose
the meager pickings of my
deceitfulness, but then it is
easy to offend ones fellow
man without knowing."Sorry
I have no time to expiate.”
                      VII
My goodness! Death’s a great
leveler, I’ve never thought of it
this way, no matter what political
system one believes in, where as one
is white, black, yellow or brown.
catholic, protestant, Jew or 
unbeliever, death is final for us
all, we all go the same way.
                      VIII
It’s got to be God’s experiment,
with life being played in stages,
each one different from the other,
neither better nor worst according to
the almighty script. But serene
beauty, no wars or conflict I
cannot envisage, the human
element would see to that.
                      IX
No! I cannot imagine a life of
angels singing, rock groups playing,
or every dead person’s wish being
fortuitously played out, after all
earth has Satan, who knows what the
next world as to offer in temptation,
dictators, two faced politicians, hard
up vicars, no doubt they’ll all be there!
                       X
My major weakness! In this life is
my inability to make one’s mind up,
but in this instance I feel I don’t have
much choice, in fact I’m bloody sure
I don’t have a choice. But alas lovely
earth with the eve of the day now
melting into the eve of my life,
I warm to the inevitable…………