Where I am from

Written by: Cat Way

I am from day old make up, from hand me down clothes and sharpie covered arms.

I am from a dirt filled well and barefoot on gravel

I am from black and brown caterpillars to the landlord’s koi pond with orange and silver creatures nibbling on my toes

I am from unwanted yearly get togethers and harsh words and tears, from Tia and Lisa to uncle Ricky  and the kids who are unfortunate enough to understand

I am from stuberness and bitterness with flashes of extreme bipolar

From “never letting down your walls” to “men are not to be trusted”

Well I have news, I didn't listen

I am from the trees, the water, the earth, the wind and the sun. I am from everything and will come back again and again, something new but always ignored

I am from Portland, land of addicts and freaks

Ramen noodles and sugar-less kool aid to grandma’s boiled over salted chicken with bisquick mushy dumplings

From the uncle who’s afraid to get close, the mom who is now finally trying to  connect but will never be able to fix the static of our relationship to the aunt who does nothing but drown her problems with a bottle of whatever is on sale

I am from nowhere for I have been everywhere. the everywhere is nowhere. Home has never been a word used much, theres only rest stops

Sheds. trailers, friends beds and couches to the ground.

Life goes up and down, so I am from the waves of living, from doubt and open arms, from hands to hands, hiding in cracks.
I am from here.