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Written by: jeffry cohan

         SO WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED IN HEAVEN?

The things God makes happen to me are consistently bad
And I constantly wish that his screwing me is only a passing fad
But alas the things that happen constantly are difficult to bear
It’s akin to God once again shoving something sharp up my rear

You simply won’t believe what occurred for me today
It’s now August and this hasn’t happened since two years from last May
It’s not something I ever expect nor do I even try to pray for
And it was something amazing I didn’t even have to pay for

I would pray for something like this happening but my prayers are all in vain
And usually the only thing that occurs is I garner a wretchedly new pain
So I have to figure that either God is deaf or he doesn’t give a good god-damn
It’s as if God is a Judas goat while I am but a lemming type lamb

I woke up at the birth of this new dawn with no high expectations
I awoke and was still one of God’s most neediest creations
So this thing happened to me and it left me egregiously aghast
Because the proof of God’s denials is imbedded deeply in my past

The alarm woke me but I hit the snooze button for ten more minutes of sleep
And in two minutes I fell back asleep but not nearly so deep
The alarmingly loud alarm went off for the second time this morn
As I once again cursed the damnable day when I had been born

I hurriedly consumed a small breakfast yet I deemed it a feast
And what happened for me was astonishing to say the very least
It was so amazing that I almost fainted right whereupon I stood
And without being specific suffice it to say God finally sent me something good!
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