Poetry Cafe's, Steven Fry and a most Annoying me

Written by: Karen Deeks

I wanna go to a poetry cafe....

In a pink beret and two giant earrings
Sporting a very serious intelligent expression which is obviously not my own
So ill borrow it from some super being like Steven Fry
Just for the night (he can sit at home looking daft, looking me) 
As i fly into the realms of fantasy

Stood in all my regalia, pink floral wellies and beige checkered hacking jacket
Purple courderoys
Spilling my beans
My limited means of getting my 
Point across.....

The avante guarde and Mrs Bohemian nod and shake
As my word snake slithers from my agile tongue
The one which spits bile
the one which wreaks havoc when im just being mum

I wanna watch the candles flicker and smoulder
With a man bag over one shoulder
Giant Havanna cigar
Peace man, way out, too far.......

I wanna travel triumphant on the train
Back home again
Resting my feet on the opposite seat 
(just because its wrong) 
Leaning drunken pon my wonky umbrella
Singing that most annoying song

'Pardon me Sir..... is that the cat hoo chewed me new shoes? '

Whilst bemused commuters gaze on

Why ever not! 

Cause Im a whimp...thats why