HONEYMOON CAPERS

Written by: Mandy Tams The Golden Girl

~Honeymoon Capers~ The big day arrived and we couldn’t wait We were old fashioned and there was no horse after the gate The wedding went off with nary a hitch A few gate crashers but we didn’t b i t c h . * The honeymoon night, boy what a thrill The emotions it caused are with us both still While showering in a hotel bathroom suite My new husband dare ask if he could now peek. Into the shower he joined me all of a quiver The sparks were shooting hither and thither I was covered in shampoo from washing my hair I tried to squeeze past him the water to share. No thought was there yet of making love in the shower We were getting to know more of each other hour by hour My new husband’s passion was obviously aroused As I stuck me head under the shower to be doused. It was then that I did slip and fall backwards with a yell Taking the shower the curtains and my husbands passion as well All I remember as my head hit the loo Was an agonised yell from my husband brand new. As my legs lifted high not for love it would seem But I kicked him in the place where he kept his lovers dreams. I woke up on the floor my head splitting in two My husband at the side of me groaning by the loo Water was pouring from the shower wall Neither could move nor dare make a call He said he knew that in marriage there could be some hard knocks But it was taking the cake to get kicked in the rocks. The toilet was cracked just like my head The bathroom was flooded we had to stay in bed Our honeymoon night our first night together Is one we will remember for ever and ever.
* Censor won't let me use it so I split it ©~GG~ 30/08/2012