What I've Become

Written by: Ava Neil

I've become tired all the time
And I wake up at noon
My dreams are too realistic and
Nightmares have begun to 
comfort me 
With their broken, clipped, 
harsh sounds

I've become to breathe with 
effort
It is no longer an automatic 
mechanism that requires no 
help
But a project that I work on all 
day
Processing the steps and 
remembering my task
Like a child learning her first 
song

I've become to keep to myself
Never joining for meals or 
Leaving the comfort of my cold, 
dark room
Where nobody will disturb me
It will be just me and music

I've become emotionless
Like a rock, or a dirty street 
curb
I will provide you with no 
sympathy
Or gratitude
Only a solid form that has a 
presence

I've become dysfunctional
Because one of my pillars has 
been taken down
One of strings was strummed 
too many times
One of my gears needs oiled
And one of my organs needs 
repaired


I am not myself.  

And who are you?