I Just Can't Win

Written by: Mark Goodson

I Just Can’t Win
I pay taxes all year long and still the IRS grins
Knowing any profits I make will go to them
Spending money on the lottery- a one in a million shot
Buying a hundred dollars in magazines but Publisher’s Clearing House never knocks
Slaving all day at mopping the floors and vacuuming the rugs
Then having four little ones drop their ice-cream with fudge
How about buying a new car-being so proud and delighted
Then driving off the lot having its value deflated
Having season tickets to the Chicago Cubs
Never to win a World Series and this really bugs
Being sick and going to the doctor is right
But when you have no insurance, the bill is out of sight
But the worst of all is entering this poetry contest
When knowing I just can’t win even though I do my best