Moronic Murderers

Written by: Natalie The Rogue Rhymer

I just love to watch Dateline
And Forty-Eight Hours Mystery…
I often scream at my television
‘How stupid can someone be?’

Their internet searches are careless
Looking up such truly awful things
‘The best way to strangle someone’ 
‘murder 4 hire’; braggin’ bout their flings!

Cell phone pings surely don’t lie
Rental car records-easy to trace
Tire impressions and fingerprints
Idiots leave DNA all over the place!

Then there are the ones who crack
Confessing at the station
They should have shut their trap
Plead the fifth, interrogation cessation 

I’ve strategized about what I'd do...
Lie in wait behind a bush?
Use Poison? Peaceful smothering? 
Or maybe a little cliffside push?

Most killers are foolish, careless
As they bid their freedom ‘adieu’
I am far more calculating, clever 
Smart enough to not tell you!

Written by:  Natalie Flikkema
For Susan’s ‘Getting Away with Murder/Murderous Thoughts’ Contest
***Now if you’ll excuse me…I’ve got to go ignite my hard drive :) ****